Seen here looking way less emoticon-y than he was in his Facebook post, 18-year old dummy Jacob Cox-Brown poses for his booking photo after being arrested following admitting to a drunken hit-and-run on his Facebook page. Drivin drunk: not so classic now is it, Jacob?
At 1 a.m. Wednesday, Riley responded to 1884 Fifth St. for a hit-and-run crash.
A white-colored Scion had been sideswiped, leaving significant damage to the car.
Later that day, Officer Riley received a private Facebook message from someone who wanted to report what Cox-Brown posted on Facebook – that he had been drinking, driving and involved in a hit-and-run.
They were also able to match pieces left behind at the scene of the crash to the vehicle registered to Cox-Brown.
Cox-Brown was arrested and lodged at the Clatsop County Jail. He was charged with two counts of failing to perform the duties of a driver.
Two counts of failing to perform the duties of a driver — that’s it? Can’t we get some failing to perform at life charges thrown in there as well? I don’t know, maybe some first degree dipshittery? Plus I vote he has to pay a yearly idiot moron tax and pick up all the trash in my yard (there’s a lot).