*Written by Rob Rimes.

I was late watching this debate, as I had to check the replay. Unfortunately, I wasn’t home and I was unable to take serious notes on it. I was at my boss’ house due to it being the annual national sales meeting for my real job and between the alcohol and festivities, this thing was hard to watch in any serious sort of manner. I regret not being able to give it my full attention but the whiskey and wine were flowing, the girls were distracting to say the least and the copious amounts of food transplanted from several of the world’s most exotic regions somehow took precedence over watching the most recent episode of ‘Three Tyrants and a Wizard’. I do apologize as I have been trying to chronicle every damn one of these things but there are just so many, seven this month alone, and turning down a chance to literally spend the night at a party thrown at the mansion of the Indian version of Caligula is incredibly hard to pass up. Bourbon soaked tits are better to stare at than three dudes arguing over their dicks and the fourth shaking his head because America’s fallen so far that we’re literally having a debate about three dicks.

Now I did go back and read the transcripts from the debate and I did watch Ron Paul’s highlights – the only important parts, as the other three’s highlights would’ve put me to sleep in my hungover stupor. If it wasn’t for my boss’ brother handing me a Bloody Mary when I walked through the office door this morning, I’d probably be curled up in a ball under my desk hiding from the flickering power-draining headache-inducing fluorescent lights over my head. Needless to say, I am not a Bloody Mary fan by any stretch of the word, as it just conjures up the thought of drinking vodka with some ketchup spilled in it, but that fucking cocktail hit the spot today and I’m about 70 percent recovered from guest-starring in the Bollywood version of ‘Eyes Wide Shut’.

I know I’m rambling about my drunken escapades and that might disinterest you, as you came to this article to experience my certain style of critique on these things, so for that I’m sorry. I will do my best to give you the rundown of the debate, as I saw it between nude champagne showers and Chilean sea bass dodgeball.

So I’m just going to go down the line and analyze the candidates one-by-one starting with Rick Santorum. He started by talking about illegal immigration, border fences and telling the story about his immigrant family for the umpteenth time. He got into it with Ron Paul on foreign policy and failed miserably as he tried to cover up the fact that he’s a goddamned idiot on the affairs of Central and South America. I’ll write more on this when I get to Ron Paul, who owned Santorum like a twenty dollar prostitute. Santorum goes on to bitch about Fannie and Freddie and in turn blasts Newt and Mitt for playing personal politics and distracting everyone from discussing the real issues. On the subject of space, Santorum said that America is a frontier country and space is the next frontier to conquer. He calls for the private sector to be more involved with NASA but doesn’t fully support government being out of it. On health care he goes on and on about how awesome he is for trying to create health savings accounts. If you were so awesome, you would’ve got it done pal! He then gets into a health care argument with Romney that is neither interesting or worth writing about but what the hell, I’ll give you the nutshell version. Basically it went something like this:

Rick Santorum: “Fuck Romneycare”
Mitt Romney: “But it was only at the state level Ricky Baby!”
Rick Santorum: “I don’t care Mitt! You’re a bitch and you gave Obama the blueprints to evil!”
Mitt Romney: “Ricky Baby, you’re so silly!”
Rick Santorum: “Jesus Bible! No health care for the gays!”

Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich spent most of their time arguing about who was a bigger bastard while both looked like big bastards. Mittens talked about “self-deportation” again. If these guys believe in such a thing as an effective way of handling a situation, can we get them to believe in “self-governance”? If they trust those illegal immigrants to leave on their own accord after sneaking in here in an effort just to come back in a way that is much more difficult, they’ve got to believe that we’re all capable of managing every other aspect of our lives? I mean, they are putting blind faith into something so farfetched that they’ve got to be down with just saying “fuck it” and letting us run our own shit, right?

On the immigration subject, Newt says that Romney is the most anti-immigrant candidate out of the four. Romney gets all pissy and pulls his two Latino cards. The first he pulls is Marco Rubio, the Cuban American senator that came to his defense on immigration. The second card Mitt pulled was Mexico, as his father was born there. I was born in a hospital bro, that doesn’t make me a doctor!

Romney and Gingrich argue about immigration for awhile and then they argue about Fannie and Freddie and who is the biggest crook. Newt, once he gets away from the lame feud for a minute, goes on some tangent about making a moon base. Newt later said that Jacksonville was going to get big pimpin’ because the Panama Canal was widening and would bring them more boat traffic. Shortly after that we were treated to a Santorum-Gingrich-Romney three-way which was like stumbling upon a middle-aged homosexual version of Cinemax at three in the morning. It was a bitch and rant fuck fest that no one in their right mind needed to see, unless of course you’re into middle-aged gay men. If you are, I mean absolutely no disrespect. Do ya thang homegirl!

Fuck all these queens, let’s get to Ron Paul, the only adult in the room. On immigration, he says that if we had a working healthy economy we wouldn’t be so worried about the immigration issue as we’d be looking for workers to fill jobs. He adds that the way we are handling our borders is actually harming our economy. He points out that we don’t have the right amount of resources on the border and that we should pay more attention to our border instead of the border between Pakistan and Afghanistan.

On the Latin America issue, Ron Paul says, “Free trade is the answer.” He throws in the fact that we’d be a lot better off if we practiced free trade with Cuba. He adds that he doesn’t like the idea that America thinks that they can go down to Central and South America and try to dictate which kind of leaders they need down there, as it is none of our business. He says that the best way to influence other nations isn’t by telling them what to do, it is by practicing friendship and free trade. Paul then references Santorum who said that we have to stand up for these nations. Paul explains that standing up for nations often times comes with us imposing ourselves on the people of these countries while picking their dictators, undermining their government and sending them a lot of money. He warns that this sort of tactic always backfires and the people we are “supporting” end up hating us. Ron Paul calls Rick Santorum’s ideas on foreign policy the “bully way”. Paul adds that he knows a better to way to work with people other than using force. Santorum shakes his head, mumbles some stupid crap and then changes his tampon while wiping his bitch tears. Checkmate Paul!

Ron Paul is asked if Mitt and Newt should return the money they’ve made off of Fannie and Freddie and he responds to thunderous applause when he says, “That subject doesn’t interest me a lot.” Paul says that Fannie and Freddie should have been auctioned off right after the crash came. He said that if it was sold, the problem would’ve been “cleansed” by now. Ron Paul says that he’s been trying to prevent this stuff which is why we need to end the Federal Reserve.

CNN’s Wolf Blitzer asks says that Ron Paul, if elected, would be the oldest president ever. He asks Paul if he would make his medical records public to show the people that he is healthy. Blitzer basically wants to paint Ron Paul as a geezer who could croak tomorrow and I find the question to be repugnant, just as I found it distasteful when the same issue was brought up with Ronald Reagan years ago. Paul said that he’ll prove how healthy he is by delivering an open challenge to all the other candidates to face him in a 25 mile bike ride in the heat of Texas. Ron Paul face-palmed the shit out of Wolf Blitzer and the other candidates with that answer. He also took a shot at Wolf himself when he jokingly pointed out that there are laws against age discrimination and that Blitzer should be careful. Wolf, after getting bitchslapped, tries to cover up the stupid question by asking the other candidates if they’d release theirs. What a tool.

On space spending, Ron Paul says that he would only approve funding on stuff that fits under defense. He says that going to the Moon and Mars is fantastic but that it could be done better by the private sector if their hands weren’t tied. Ron Paul then takes a shot at Newt, saying that he has stretched the truth with all his “balanced budget” claims from the days when he was Speaker of the House. Ron Paul is taking solid shots backed by facts and there is nothing that can be done about it when he brings these guys a dose of the truth. Strangely, Newt Gingrich was very polite and gracious to Ron Paul all night and gave him props for his ideas in several areas.

In the end, the debate was lightyears better than the NBC debate a few days prior. CNN does the best job, in my opinion, and I’ve watched every single one of these debates. Kudos to Wolf for rocking the house, even with a few prickish questions. Ron Paul owned the motherfucker, Santorum did decent if you are into his religio-fascist bullshit while Newt and Mitt looked like a few bickering Tinas arguing over the last pack of Lee Press-On Nails at K-Mart.

And that’s all I got because I immediately returned to my whiskey-scented orgy on the south lawn.

Grading Scale:
Grade A+: Ron Paul
Grade C-: Rick Santorum
Grade D+: Newt Gingrich
Grade D: Mitt Romney

*Best debate moment in recent memory:

Star Wars creator George Lucas said Monday that Hollywood studios refused to back his new film Red Tails - about World War II’s Tuskegee Airmen – because the cast was all black.

This was told to a rather stunned Jon Stewart on Comedy Central’s Daily Show

For those not familiar, the Tuskegee Airmen were a group of black pilots that fought in WWII segregated from white forces.

“It was designed to be during the war,” Lucas said. “It’s very patriotic, very jingoistic, very old-fashioned, corny, just exactly like Flying Leathernecks only this one was held up for release from 1942 when it was shot, and I’ve been trying to get it released ever since.”

Lucas told Stewart he’s been working on the film for 23 years. Although paying for it himself, he went to the studios to create the prints, ads, and be responsible for distribution.

“I showed it to all of them and they said, ‘No. We don’t know how to market a movie like this.’”

When Stewart asked why, Lucas first responded, “Because it’s not green enough. They only release green movies.”

The filmmaker clarified, “It’s because it’s an all black movie. There’s no major white roles in it at all. It’s one of the first all black action pictures ever made.”

Lucas continued, “It’s a reasonably expensive movie. Normally black movies, say Tyler Perry movies or something, you know, they’re very low-budget, and, even they won’t release his movies. It goes to the lower, not major distributors. And they do well, but they do a certain amount of money, and they know what that is, and this costs more than those movies make. And they don’t believe there’s any foreign market for it. That’s 60 percent of their profit.”

Sadder still was how Hollywood balked given the message Lucas was trying to convey.

“I wanted to make it inspirational for teenaged boys. I wanted to show that they have heroes, they’re real American heroes, they’re patriots that helped to make the country what it is today. And it’s not Glory where you have a lot of white officers running these guys into cannon fodder. It’s like a real, they were real heroes.”

And Hollywood said, “No.”

Just remember that the next time some movie star or film director calls Republicans or members of the Tea Party racist.

Source: Newsbusters. Video at link.

*Taken from Prison Planet. Written by Paul Joseph Watson. Video at link.

Federally-funded high-tech street lights now being installed in American cities are not only set to aid the DHS in making “security announcements” and acting as talking surveillance cameras, they are also capable of “recording conversations,” bringing the potential privacy threat posed by ‘Intellistreets’ to a whole new level.

In the days after we first brought attention to the privacy concerns surrounding the new street lights, with our story featuring prominently on the Drudge Report website, the company behind them, Illuminating Concepts, went on the defensive, issuing a press release claiming the devices didn’t represent a “big brother” intrusion.

However, as you can see from the video above, ‘Intellistreets’ is big brother on steroids. George Orwell himself would probably have considered the concept too far-fetched to appear in the dystopian classic1984.

CONTINUED..

 *Written by Cody Bennett.

I’ve learned more about history in the four years after I graduated high school than I learned in all my twelve years of public education. I have no formal education outside of high school except for independent research that I’ve done out of curiosity and skepticism. The result is that I am better informed and more knowledgeable about a wider range of subjects than most college graduates. Not to sound my own horn, but toot, toot.

Anyway, my schooling experience was one of repressed curiosity and compulsory indoctrination—a constant struggle of trying to discover an identity and a creative voice in an environment that encouraged neither. I’m sure most people remember the angst and the awkwardness.

Well, I graduated in 2007. High school is four years behind me, and it’s probably a considerable amount of years behind all of you. It’s difficult to even maintain any sort of concern for the conditions we managed to escape, much less try to do anything about them. Except, right now as you read this there are millions of American teenagers putting up with the same system.

Standing up for the pledge…make sure to put your hand over your heart. Remain standing for the national anthem… Now for the morning announcements…for lunch we’ll be having flavorless slop…blah, blah, blah.

The toes tapping on linoleum floors. Pencils sliding across paper. The smell of dry-erase markers. The ringing of the bell at the beginning and end of every period. The same methodical march to-and-fro, day in, day out.

Oh, yes, and don’t forget to do your homework. It would be a shame if you didn’t do your homework.

The system we have now is archaic. It was designed for a different time. We keep trying to patch it up, to push it one more mile, to standardize just a little more. But it is unworkable. We are trying to give a tune up to a vehicle with blown head-gaskets. The approach modern progressives are taking toward education is one founded not upon reason, but insanity. The conservative approach isn’t much different. George W. Bush was responsible for the No Child Left Behind Act, which expanded standardized education on a national basis.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results. If someone is overdosing, you don’t give him more drugs, because that’s insane. Correct this problem, and the rest of America’s problems will be solved consequentially. By creating freedom and more choices in the realm of education, we can improve the economy, the environment, and our own individual lives. The answer is to get rid of standard-based, pass-fail regulations. The answer is to not look to the state for your education. The answer is self-education. It’s done wonders for me.

Look: here is some history that I learned all by myself.

Until the middle of the 19^th Century, education was mostly localized and available only to the wealthy. However, rapid westward expansion, hoards of immigrants, and the Industrial Revolution began to make it apparent that the nation needed some sort of model for educating the children being born into this brave new world.

Horace Mann, in the 1840’s, began a campaign for what were called “common schools”. These schools would teach children basic skills such as reading, writing and math. Our grade schools today still carry similarities to the common schools of which Mann was so fond.

By 1851, Massachusetts passed legislation including compulsory attendance and standardize teacher certification tests. Within twenty years, 7.6 million kids were enrolled in common schools and the number of teachers in the nation had risen to 125,000. Less than a decade later, the number was up to 340,000.

The first Department of Education was established in 1867 after the National Teacher’s Association lobbied congress to establish a presidential cabinet office dedicated to national education concerns. The very next year the department was demoted to an office, becoming just a small bureau in the Department of the Interior.

With this kind of expansion going on, public schools turned into education factories, taking on the same functionality of the newly industrialized nation. To sum it up, kids were being taught in a merely intellectual manner based on the principles of the Enlightenment, but under a model that resembled the changes brought about by the Industrial Revolution. The principles of the Enlightenment, which tout liberty, reason and individual responsibility, would be in direct contrast with the pragmatic, collectivist, rank-in-file attitude of industrialization.

This is how America’s schools, nearly overnight, became authoritarian institutes requiring the standardized, compulsory education of all citizens. In other words, you don’t have a choice in the matter, because the federal government knows what is best for you. Since the beginning of the 20^th Century, our federal government has expanded public education to the point of crisis. And even though we’ve made advancements in the classroom as far as technology and curriculum, we still use the same sort of classroom model as we did over a century ago. All education reform that has had any major effect on the nation has always been in the direction of more standardized testing and more centralized political control of our schools. Yet, the system is still failing.

One reason I believe the system is failing is because the people who design the legislation aren’t the people in the classrooms. But the biggest reason it is failing is because we are using an out-dated model that doesn’t mix well with our fast-paced, information based culture.

Those are the problems. Here are the solutions.

Abolish the Department of Education. This is not a radical idea. It was a Republican Party policy for many years.

This can be done by local community activism, and hounding our representatives to actually put this issue on the table again. In Florida, a campaign for the federal deregulation of public schools, repeal of the No Child Left Behind Act, and an exemption from the Sunshine State Standards should be embarked upon. With those shackles released, I propose school vouchers in order to create competition between schools.

Check this: instead of what district you live in determining where you go to school and who gets the funding, parents will be given vouchers for the net-cost-per-year it takes to put a student through school. The parents can then choose their children’s school. If a school could operate under the cost of the voucher, the balance would roll over into the next year for that family. With the roll over money from the vouchers, parents could create a college fund for their children.

If adopted by the entire State of Florida, this model could eventually decentralize education for the entire nation. It would simultaneously create competition among the states for everything from colleges to pre-schools. The states with flawed models would ultimately fail, and through common sense they would adopt the models that succeed.

There is one thing that must be understood. My model doesn’t say anything about what standards schools should teach, nor do I mean to suggest any. For me, a teacher is merely someone who bestows knowledge upon others. I am a teacher. You probably are, too. We educate, and are educated every day. The truth, though, is that everyone is responsible for his own education at some point. If we want to change the way we educate the country, we have to change our attitudes. As individuals, we must take hold of our own minds and make our own decisions based on our own judgment. That is the capacity of an educated mind.

We must teach our children to do the same.

*Taken from Prison Planet. Written by Paul Joseph Watson.

The company behind a Department of Homeland Security-funded project to install street lights that double as sophisticated surveillance devices pulled its promo video for ‘Intellistreets’ from You Tube hours after our article drawing attention to the issue was linked on the popular Drudge Reportwebsite.

Having initially disabled comments on the You Tube clip, Illuminating Concepts yanked the video entirely this afternoon, presumably nervous about the negative publicity that could be generated from concerns about new high-tech street lights being used for “Homeland Security” purposes – their words, not ours.

However, having gone to the trouble of putting together a promotional video for their product, and having already started installing the system in the city of Farmington Hills, Michigan with the aid of federal funding, the fact that the company attempted to prevent people learning about the “Homeland Security” applications for the street lights speaks volumes.

CONTINUED..

*Taken from Prison Planet. Written by Paul Joseph Watson.

New street lights that include “Homeland Security” applications including speaker systems, motion sensors and video surveillance are now being rolled out with the aid of government funding.

The Intellistreets system comprises of a wireless digital infrastructure that allows street lights to be controlled remotely by means of a ubiquitous wi-fi link and a miniature computer housed inside each street light, allowing for “security, energy management, data harvesting and digital media,”according to the Illuminating Concepts website.

According to the company’s You Tube video of the concept, the primary capabilities of the devices include “energy conservation, homeland security, public safety, traffic control, advertising, video surveillance.”

CONTINUED..

My Two Cents: Do I need to point out the obvious? End Two Cents.

*Taken from The Hill.

Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif.) said Tuesday that his committee plans to investigate government loan programs to private corporations in light of allegations of improper dealings between the White House and failed energy company Solyndra and wireless start-up LightSquared.

“I want to see when the president and his cronies are picking winners and losers… it wasn’t because there were large contributions given to them,” the chairman of the Oversight and Government Reform Committee said Tuesday morning on C-SPAN.

Issa said the committee was looking at whether it was improper for members of Congress or White House staff to select companies eligible for subsidized government loans when those companies could give campaign donations. Loan programs have been a popular tool to provide funding for popular industries — like tech, green energy, and American auto companies — at more favorable terms than could be secured privately.

CONTINUED..

*Written by Rob Rimes.

There are too many debates this month. This is the second of three and that’s not counting the Palmetto Freedom Forum that occurred just over a week ago. The candidates must be worn out and I can’t imagine how they’ll be feeling come the next debate, which is just a week away! All this hard work is paying off however, at least for my candidate Ron Paul. After the last two debates and the forum, his support has doubled: in less than two weeks! Is liberty shining through all the bullshit? Man, I fucking hope so!

Being the second CNN debate, I was a little worrisome, as last time I was assaulted by the throat gargling of John King. I was pretty hard on homeboy but that shit did get extremely annoying. Lucky for me, John King was a no show and we were treated to the the legendary prowess of Wolf Blitzer, who can be a douche at times but is still a much better choice to head this debate up than what I am assuming is Larry King’s little brother or son or possibly daughter.

Kicking off the debate is a video introduction that looks like they are introducing the Avengers. This summer blockbuster trailer is kind of cool, well until they get to Ron Paul. Everyone else looked powerful and badass but for Dr. Paul they picked a clip of him looking frail, leaning against a shelf. What the fuck man, can the the media hate for the libertarian guy be any more obvious? Fucking dickholes. Anyway, moving on.

So after the intro video of Earth’s mightiest heroes, Wolf Blitzer called them out one by one in what felt like wrestlers running to the ring at the Royal Rumble. However, none of them had any badass theme music. If I was producing this show, they’d all come out to some generic death metal. I do have to say, love him or hate him (I hate him), even without cool theme music, Rick Perry does look like a fucking president walking across that stage. Too bad he’s an evil bastard, then again most presidents have had a twinge of evil bastard in them.

Wolf introduces some chick to sing the national anthem. No offense but shouldn’t this have been done before the show? There hasn’t been a national anthem televised on any other debate, including the first CNN one, so why is it suddenly necessary? I’d rather have more times for questions. Also, this chick singing is pretty atrocious, not to say that I wouldn’t hit it though. Bachmann looks enthralled with her however. I can almost read Michele’s thoughts. She’s saying to herself, “I hope she ate the cheese platter I left her.” I bet Michele did leave her a cheese platter, she is a really nice motherly lady. Enough with this singer though, I’ve heard better from my drunk uncle Titus down at the Winghole on Karaoke Wednesdays.

Next up are the time-wasting introductions.. yawn. Can’t we just get to it already?! We’re thirteen minutes deep at this point! All I got from this was that Ron Paul promises to obey the Constitution and Newt gave a shout out to his homies in 9/12. Odd, considering it is actually 9/12.

Holy shit! Whoa! Stop the press! Wolf Blitzer didn’t start with Rick Perry or Mitt Romney! Are we seeing a change of the guard in the Golden Boy Club? The first question goes to golden girl Michele Bachmann, who isn’t as funny as Bea Arthur, at least not intentionally. The first subject is Social Security.

Michele basically says that she is down with Social Security because it was a promise made decades ago. Basically this pro-constitution fiscally responsible Tea Party darling is cool with socialism as long as it was delivered with a promise. Good job sticking to your guns lady.

Darth Perry who called Social Security a Ponzi scheme last debate, less than a week ago, is now backtracking on that statement. Homie must own more flip flops than Mitt. Perry goes as far as to say that it is “slam dunk guaranteed” that social security will be there for everyone if he is elected president. Romney and Perry then immediately start slapping each other like a couple of old ladies in the Jello line at the nursing home. I tune out mentally and take a big swig of my Stella Artois.

The only people offering real solutions to the Social Security problem are Herman Cain and Ron Paul. Last debate Cain mentioned that we should adopt the Chilean model for reforming Social Security but this debate, he actually has time to break it down for us. Cain’s already off to a great start this debate.

Holy shit, now Newt is on the bandwagon and pimping the Chilean model as well. As he speaks, he gets both cheers and boos and both very loudly. People either love or hate this guy. I’m not a fan policy-wise but I do enjoy his presence in these debates.

Somewhere in the middle of all this Social Security talk, Jon Huntsman refers to Mitt Romney as Kurt Cobain. His pop culture references are twenty years old. He tries to be funny but he fails. He should be on a bad CW buddy sitcom with Rick Santorum called “Just Dicks”.

Santorum speaks, no one cares. Where’s Gary Johnson?

The next part of the debate goes into the budget and general economics. As we face economic peril, these questions are some of the most important of the night. However, most of the answers given were shit.

Newt steps up first and talks about how there is too much waste in government and that by eliminating it we can come closer to balancing the budget. Yeah dude, that’s pretty much common sense and we all already know that. Those of you who aren’t aware of this should probably just go back to bed. Newt goes on to bash the Super Congress, which shouldn’t even exist and he calls for a modernization of the federal government.

Rick Santorum between fixing his racquets says that we need to adopt the Paul Ryan Plan. Most conservatives are on this bandwagon but the truth is, it doesn’t do much to alleviate the problem. Santorum doesn’t live in reality however and neither does anyone else pimping this plan.

Rick Perry is asked if he would cut drug prescription benefits and he says “no”. He obviously likes government spending the way it is. Rick Perry says whatever he needs to say to stay afloat. He is a professional panderer.

Romney promises to cut and cap spending and even wants a balanced budget amendment. Without an amendment the government can’t be fiscally responsible. I’m going to quit paying my bills and just use the excuse that I personally need an amendment to force me to stop buying whiskey, ties and pipe tobacco. Mittens also promises to completely restructure the economy and create jobs in the process. Sounds like sorcery!

Ron Paul says that he is looking for a lot of places to cut. He then goes on to pimp out his anti-war message and receives loud pops from the crowd. He talks about cutting funding to education, national security and energy. All these areas need to be looked at and seriously analyzed, as they suck up a huge portion of our budget. Bringing our damn troops home would also help the budget immensely.

Rick Perry starts regurgitating Tea Party talking points that he stole from a pamphlet he found lying next to the Port-O-Lets at the Tampa Fairgrounds. Huntsman promises to reform the tax code within his first 100 days. Bachmann pats herself on the back per usual and promises to repeal everything. Can we repeal ‘Avatar’ from being made? Can we at least repeal funding going to the production of any sequels? Herman Cain tells the world to go check his 999 Plan but he doesn’t mention the FairTax. I wonder if that is a part of his 999 Plan; I will have to give it a quick read over.

Mitt Romney then comes out and says that, “We are an energy rich nation living like an energy poor nation.” He also says that we’re in a smartphone world and not a payphone world and that Obama is still putting quarters in the payphone or something like that. All I can say is, “Fuck payphones!” Those things are dirty, grimy, germy and stinky. They also smell like hobo nut sweat. All this does though is lead to another spat between Romney and Perry and this one is full of weird poker references and extreme awkwardness by both candidates. Wolf Blitzer blushes when Rick Perry winks at him. Maybe I imagined that part. In any event, Wolf has some obvious man-love for the Texas Gub’ner.

Ron Paul destroys the man-love by pointing out the reality of Rick Perry’s record (I wrote about his record here). Dr. Paul points out that Perry has implemented higher taxes and created more debt in the process. Ron Paul peels back the layers and Perry, looking visibly uncomfortable, just makes wise cracks about Ron Paul. Truth is, the record Perry touts is bullshit. The media doesn’t care though, he’s dreamy!

The next subject to come up is the Federal Reserve. Oddly, not a single fucking question about the Fed or Ben Bernanke went to Ron Paul, who is the chairman of the U.S. House Financial Services Subcommittee on Domestic Monetary Policy. Basically, Ron Paul deals with Bernanke and the Fed on a daily basis! Yet, not a single fucking question went to the expert on the subject.

Former Federal Reserve employee Herman Cain was asked a question however. He was asked if the Fed should be audited. Cain who used to be against auditing the Federal Reserve now says that we should. He says that he doesn’t want to end the Fed but he does want to fix it. That’s not good enough for me, sorry homie.

Michele Bachmann says she would fire Ben Bernanke. Of course she would and so would everyone else up there because to say that you would keep him would be career suicide at this point. Everyone else pretty much says the same thing. Romney insists he will look into the Fed: no he won’t. Rick Perry does backtrack on his remark from two debates back where he called Ben Bernanke “treasonous”. Perry is backtracking and flippin’ the script like a little bitch this round. Starting to see a trend yet?

A young Tea Partier in the crowd asks “How much of my paycheck should I be allowed to keep?” It is a great question that should be asked to every single candidate on that stage, however Wolf Blitzer just asks Jon Huntsman: what a waste. Huntsman, the living embodiment of the politician stereotype, beats around the bush and never truly answers the question. One of the best questions of the night is thrown away like a used condom after sex with a Carson City hooker under an overpass.

A Tea Partier on the giant TV then asks about the FairTax and the question is given to Mitt Romney who doesn’t support it and tries to explain why. The problem is that Mitt obviously doesn’t understand the FairTax and how it works. He claims that it punishes the middle class. Nope dude.. it doesn’t. Go read one of the Boortz books or read any of the countless FairTax articles that are posted on FairTax.org and TheSwash.com. Wolf Blitzer is really good at picking the wrong people to ask specific questions. The audience members that got to participate in the debate were cheated.

Things really start to heat up in a good way when Ron Paul speaks out against the use of executive orders. Dr. Paul says that executive orders should never be used for legislation and that anyone who uses them to make law is not working within the frame of the Constitution. Ron Paul then points out that it was Rick Perry who abused the executive order power in trying to force teen girls to get vaccinated. Rick Perry once again looks uncomfortable and can’t effectively dig himself out of this hole. How could he? There is no excuse for this even though too many people are turning a blind eye to it or somehow accepting it and forgetting it.

Perry tries to get out of the hole by saying he’d use his executive order powers as president to repeal Obamacare. This fucksack just can’t face the goddamned music. Bachmann gets really pissed and informs the idiot Perry that you can’t just repeal it with an executive order, he needs to learn how this shit works. She then goes on and on about parental rights and how Perry violated them and is pretty much an evil fucking bastard.

Of course Wolf Blitzer continually allows Perry to respond to every criticism, which isn’t a luxury that he has been giving to anyone else on the stage. Bachmann isn’t having any of Perry’s shit and she points out that he has close ties with Merck, the drug company behind the vaccination. I remember when I used to tell people this and they called me a “conspiracy nut”. Bachmann is bouncing back in this debate and showing that she’s not ready to leave the hunt.

Suddenly, Rick Santorum starts ripping Rick Perry a new asshole too! This is great. Santorum is an idiot douche but Darth Perry getting slammed has got me cheering on any and all comers that want to challenge the Sith bastard. Perry is crawling in his skin and it’s awesome to watch. Rick Perry literally pulls a shit sandwich out of his jacket pocket and takes a bite. Nomnomnom!

Health care is the next big issue and Herman Cain starts the discussion by saying that he wants to implement a “loser pays” law, as it would help eliminate bad lawsuits against doctors, thus eliminating the high cost of their liability insurance and thus the high cost of health care in general.

Ron Paul says that, “Freedom is about risk”. When it comes to health care it is a person’s responsibility to take care of themselves, just like anything else. However, he points out that the charitable nature of man wouldn’t just let people die in the streets. Being the only doctor on stage and having practiced medicine before all the medical entitlements, he tells us about how even before Medicare and Medicaid all the hospitals he worked in never turned people away. He also talked about how churches and other organizations would work to help the less fortunate as they do now, except they would be even more charitable if their hands weren’t tied due to the cost of health care and the restraints of the over-regulated system.

Some guy from Cincinnati asks the candidates what we should do ’bout all dem Messicans. The first to get on that is Rick Santorum who literally calls for “Stormtroopers” on the border! No, he really called for “Stormtroopers”! Apparently he also wants a super fence and a Death Star pointed at Mexico. Man, I thought Darth Perry was the Sith.

Rick Perry blames the federal government for slacking in taking care of the border issues. Wait, hold up.. this guy calling for states’ rights is now bitching that the feds haven’t taken care of business. The reality of this is that Perry is a lazy fuck when it comes to dealing with the GOP solution on immigration. Homeboy needs to check his record and then he needs to check his ass. He throws in there that a fence won’t work; he’s right about that.

Rick Santorum doesn’t like Perry’s insight about the fence though and he jumps down his throat. Santorum goes on a tirade about speaking English and how he came from immigrants. Yeah dude, we all did except those of us living on reservations.

Bachmann steps into the immigration debate and, as is the trend, she jacks Ron Paul’s platform. Bachmann believes that the real problem is the welfare state and that it needs to be severely reformed to prevent illegal aliens from benefitting from it. Actually honey, it needs to be abolished.

Rick Perry says that he is against amnesty for illegal aliens but is quickly attacked by Jon Huntsman who calls Perry “treasonous” for saying that the border cannot be physically secured by a fence. Perry is right here and Huntsman is just picking a fight to be relevant in this debate. I sort of like Jon Huntsman, simply for the fact that he is a total dick. Huntsman gets some extra points for dissing Homeland Security.

Herman Cain then tells us that he wants to create a “regulatory reduction commission” to overlook government agencies such as the EPA. I like this idea as long as it doesn’t cost a lot of money. Then again, if used correctly, it could save us tons of money and justify the cost of its existence. Then again, when does government do anything right?

Ron Paul is confronted with his vocal opposition to military spending and explains to Wolf Blitzer and the people watching that there is a difference between military spending and defense spending. Yes, there certainly is. Unfortunately the average American citizen and politician can’t wrap their head around that simple bit of logic. This of course angers pretty much everyone in the room and Ron Paul has to explain that jihadists are pissed about our involvement in their lives and the fact that we occupy their countries. He goes on to explain Osama bin Laden’s reasoning for attacking us on 9/11 by using Osama’s own words. The crowd boos because the crowd can’t accept the fact that we have an imperialistic military that steps on nuts all over the world. No! no! no! They just hate us because we’re white and different! We never did anything to piss them off!

Ron Paul’s insightful lesson is followed up by Huntsman saying that we need to get out of Afghanistan. Rick Perry then steps up to the mic and says that it is important to have a military presence in Afghanistan to help them form a civil freedom-loving society. I guess he believes the myth that warring tribes can be civil.

Wolf Blitzer then asks the final question of the night to all the candidates. He asks what each and every one of them would bring to the White House. Santorum says he’d build a room for his kids.. yawn. Ron Paul says he’s bringing Austrian economics and common sense. Newt says something about ballet. Perry says he’s bringing the best First Lady ever. Huntsman says something lame. Bachmann says something crazy. Romney fixes his hair. Cain says he’s bringing a sense of humor. I’m bringing cotton candy.

This debate ends and we’re all left with just a little bit more of the same. I think the most important thing of the night was Rick Perry getting called out on his bullshit and being exposed as an evil Sith bastard. Bachmann earned some respect for going off on the Texas Governor. I also have to give props to Paul for trying to educate the lesser beings to no avail. Don’t worry Dr. Paul, after their campaign staff explains your talking points to them, they’ll steal some of your platform for the next debate.

In the end, this was one of the better debates. I wish certain parts of the debate were better managed and that Wolf Blitzer used better judgment on who to ask specific questions. Ah well, at least we didn’t have that pervert John King making unsexy throat noises. At the end of the day, this is just one of several debates and the road to 2012 is far from over. In fact, we still have a year before we even find out who wins the primary. There’s also another dozen or so debates on the horizon. It’s going to be a long year but at least it has been entertaining. At this point, anything can happen.

Grading Scale:
Grade A: Ron Paul
Grade B+: Herman Cain
Grade B: Michele Bachmann
Grade C-: Newt Gingrich
Grade D: Mitt Romney
Grade D: Rick Santorum
Grade D-: Rick Perry
Grade D-: Jon Huntsman
Grade I: Gary Johnson
Grade I: Thaddeus McCotter

*Taken from Yahoo News.

Defense Secretary Robert Gates warned Congress on Sunday not to cut off funding for U.S. military involvement in Libya and predicted that the operation targeting Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi’s forces will “end OK.”

Lawmakers question the legality of President Barack Obama’s continued use of the U.S. military in Libya without the approval of Congress.

House of Representatives Speaker John Boehner, the top Republican in Congress, last week said Congress could cut funding for U.S. military involvement in Libya, ratcheting up pressure on Obama.

Gates, who departs as Pentagon chief this month after serving in the post under one Democratic and one Republican president, noted that earlier during his stint in the job Congress also threatened to cut off funding for the Iraq war.

CONTINUED..