*Written by Rob Rimes.

Yesterday was a pretty emotional day for Paul supporters everywhere. The Paul campaign announced that they would no longer compete in the states that have not yet voted as it would cost too much money moving forward. In fact, here is what Ron Paul said himself:

Moving forward, however, we will no longer spend resources campaigning in primaries in states that have not yet voted. Doing so with any hope of success would take many tens of millions of dollars we simply do not have.

This is completely understandable and really just goes to show how fiscally responsible Dr. Paul truly is, especially when comparing him to his conservative counterparts who spent themselves into oblivion and racked up some serious campaign debt. With that being said, this is only more reason to vote for the man as he knows where to draw the line and also knows what all of Paul supporters know, which is that we will all continue to vote for the man regardless of the campaign’s inability to compete with the Wall Street funded Mitt Romney. When those Occupy kids are looking for a leader it should probably be the guy whose campaign is funded by the downtrodden 99 percent as opposed to the 1 percent big bank bank funded candidates like Romney and Obama.

This doesn’t mean that Paul is completely out of this race. As was just mentioned, his supporters are loyal and will vote for him despite this seemingly tragic pitfall. The hunt for delegates will continue and ultimately, Ron Paul will continue to surprise the doubters and make a serious impact on this race. This isn’t blind faith or overly-loyal Paulbot idiocy, this is facts. I doubted the campaign’s strategy but have since learned that in the realm of acquiring delegates, they are doing a hell of a job. The media doesn’t accurately report on what’s going on in the delegate hunt and honestly, you can go to various mainstream media sites and look at their delegate counts and the numbers don’t match – corporate media is clueless. Romney may have been announced the winner in Maine but Paul walked away with the most delegates. Santorum and Gingrich have lost theirs and with 11 states left to vote, Paul could continue to be a thorn in the side of the establishment beast. As I’ve said many times, this isn’t about winning, this is about the message and gaining enough support to stamp it on the leviathan’s forehead before it is once again let loose on the masses. In other words, Paul might not win the fight but he is going to break a motherfucker’s nose.

Even though the mainstream media has been quick to gleefully write Paul off as a quitter, his forces are moving forward – just more covertly in a way that is unique and foreign to these political experts spewing regurgitated pre-written bullshit through our television and radio speakers. In order to dispel the mainstream hogwash, Paul’s chief strategist Jesse Benton sent out an official statement. Here is some of what that memo states:

Let me be very clear. Dr. Paul is NOT ending his campaign. As Dr. Paul has previously stated, he is in this race all the way to the Republican National Convention in Tampa this August. Looking ahead, our campaign must honor that trust by maximizing our resources to ensure the greatest possible impact at the National Convention. So while our campaign is no longer investing in the remaining primary states, we will continue to run strong programs at District and State Conventions to win more delegates and alternate delegates to the National Convention.

To this end, our campaign has several positive and realistic goals: 1) Having recently WON Maine, we believe we can win several more states. 2) We will win party leadership positions at both the state and national level. 3) We will continue to grow our already substantial total of delegates.

We will head to Tampa with a solid group of delegates. Several hundred will be bound to Dr. Paul, and several hundred more, although bound to Governor Romney or other candidates, will be Ron Paul supporters.

Unfortunately, barring something very unforeseen, our delegate total will not be strong enough to win the nomination. Governor Romney is now within 200 delegates of securing the party’s nod. However, our delegates can still make a major impact at the National Convention and beyond. All delegates will be able to vote on party rules and allow us to shape the process for future liberty candidates.

We are in an excellent position to make sure the Republican Party adds solid liberty issues to the GOP Platform, which our delegates will be directly positioned to approve. Our campaign is presently working to get several items up for consideration, including monetary policy reform, prohibitions on indefinite detention, and Internet freedom.

Finally, by sending a large, respectful, and professional delegation to Tampa, we will show the Party and the country that not only is our movement growing and here to stay, but that the future belongs to us…

Considering that two of the biggest states, California and Paul’s home state Texas, haven’t yet voted, there are a shitload of delegates that could easily go Paul’s way, especially since he has performed well in both of those states. The race is still as interesting as it has been all along, even though the media is ignoring Paul and pretending he isn’t even a part of this race anymore. Their “out of sight, out of mind” strategy hasn’t worked in the past and it won’t work this time. Paul supporters aren’t going anywhere and their numbers will continue to expand.

In retrospect, was this even about winning the presidency or was this about turning the Republican Party on its head and making a real difference? Is this really about shattering one half of the two-party mold in an effort to fix the system from within? If so, will it work? Either way, this game has been well-played by the Paul camp and ultimately it’s up to us everyday people to see that the message is sent and clearly understood. From here on out, this game is going to get pretty fucking filthy. Put on your gloves because we aren’t done swingin’!

*Written by Rob Rimes.

Mitt Fucking Romney. The name is synonymous with dissatisfaction. Well, one would think anyway. The consensus from most conservative people is that they didn’t want this guy to be their candidate. They tried so hard to prop up all the other GOP weaklings but Mr. Romney was just slightly stronger it seems and because of that, is the last man standing for the establishment righties to vote for. I mean, they aren’t going to vote for Ron Paul, that much has been established and since they’re going to vote for “Anyone but Obama” (which doesn’t include Paul), I guess it should be no surprise that Captain Haircut swept three more states on the road to the nomination.

Romney racked up victories in West Virginia, Indiana and North Carolina. North Carolina wasn’t a surprise as the people there also voted to ban gay marriage. Surprisingly though, their intolerant right-wing idiocy didn’t push Santorum to the front of the pack, even though he is completely out of the race. I know that sounds crazy but look at West Virginia. Santorum actually came in second place in that state ahead of Ron Paul! Santorum who isn’t even in the race and who has endorsed Romney beat Ron Paul who is still in this thing! It’s not a showing of how weak Paul may seem to be, it is a showing of how insane the inbred people of West Virginia are. I mean, didn’t those ‘Wrong Turn’ movies take place there? You know what I’m talking about, those cheap ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ knockoffs that saw incest-loving mutant hillbillies hunting and eating tourists who accidentally turned off of the main road and into their neck of the woods. Sounds like Santorum cultists for sure.

With Ron Paul in second albeit last place, Santorum’s performance was pointless and the backwoods beasts who voted for him are retarded for even bothering to show up to their precincts. Maybe all the precincts were barbecue joints and the customers got confused and thought they were filling out comment cards. It really is hard to say when we are dealing with people who have the brains of ravenous rabies-afflicted canines. The people who casted votes for Gingrich might be even slightly more insane. Whatever, I’m tired of bashing these people and frankly, I don’t want them to eat me alive. Luckily, Florida is a long way away and these West Virginia mutants can’t operate a GPS system and would probably just use maps to make clothes.

At least Dr. Paul is racking up a shitload of delegates and even though he won’t be staring down Obama in an upcoming debate, he has still proven to be a force of fucking nature in this race regardless of media blackouts, blatant bias and establishment shenanigans. These fuckers can try and fix an election but they can’t fix the brains of the vigilant self-educated masses who are growing in numbers year after year. As I stated previously, it looks like the Paul campaign’s questionable delegate hunting tactics have worked to some degree, especially now that former Senator Ass Juice and former Speaker of the House Newt Giggles have dropped like flies drunk on Off! Bug Spray.

The clock is counting down and the Republican National Convention is just around the corner. When Tampa comes, shit could get really interesting in this race. Hopefully by then, the Santorum mutants have gone back to eating lost teenagers and the Gingrich supporters have gone back to living in holes. I guess it just bothers me that people are stupid enough to put a check next to a name on a ballot when that candidate is a quitter. Well, losers typically flock to other losers and when your grey matter is made up of the sort of stuff a typical right-wing establishment neo-conservative has between their ears, you are going to make really stupid decisions while contributing to the downfall of this country.

Truth be told, I know this is coming off as somewhat irate and that I am resorting to name-calling but fuck you people. I’m not going to hide behind some political correct bullshit in an effort to save face and have a sane and rational discussion with you people when everything about you is insane and irrational. Stop being such parasites and stop living your fucking fear turtle life in a goddamned shell afraid of every boogeyman your worthless heroes throw at you. It’s time to stop looking at everyone that doesn’t jive with your bullshit philosophy as an enemy. That goes for other nations, the other side of the political coin and other Americans who aren’t privy to your psychotic idiocy. Now you may be thinking that I am being hypocritical in my words and that I am coming at you like you are my enemy or better yet that you are the enemy of anyone who is a libertarian, a constitutionalist or a free-thinker. I’m not, I’m just sick of the games and being labeled crazy when you are the assholes who are stuck in your ways – ways that have been proven to fail again and again. None of you want to try anything new or examine history, you just want to keep your side of the assembly line moving in an effort to beat out the other side. Whether that’s for bragging rights or just because you want to win just for the sake of winning, doesn’t fucking matter to me! Both sides of the assembly line are in a rush and are in turn making really shitty products while pointing fingers back and forth. It’s time to shut this inefficient factory down and move the business elsewhere. Rant over.

And congratulations Mr. Romney. You really took it to those weak contenders.

*Written by Rob Rimes.

I had a long weekend but it is now over. My time in Gainesville with my cousin and friends was a blast, as I haven’t actually been partying too hard over the last month. This trip was a good way for me to drown in bourbon, Irish whiskey, tequila, Long Islands, Guinness, ginger beer and Pabst. I’ve been trying to be healthier in an attempt to lose weight and potentially live a somewhat longer life but even with my more health conscious attitude, my inner party monster still needs to be entertained and unleashed every now and again. What better time than with other party monsters that I genuinely cherish in a wild college town during graduation weekend? There was no point in taking any prisoners, as we ran roughshod over downtown Gainesville leaving no bottle unturned. A few days later, my stomach still hurts and my head is still swimming in a sea of 86 proof delirium – a special shout out goes to 1.75 liters of Old Crow Reserve.

To those who might find my more health conscious behavior a bit unsettling, there is no need to worry. It’s not called selling out when you do it because your liver hurts and you’ve been pissing blood. The blood part was not related to the booze but it was still a wake up call to straighten my shit out some what. Have no fear though, I will not go soft and become a shell of my former self like so many writers and artists who went clean only for their work to suffer and lose its appeal. Trent Reznor immediately comes to mind, although his Academy Award for a very boring and minimalist film score probably proves me wrong but only if you take the Academy seriously and turn a blind eye to their petty politics.

Anyway, my first night in Gainesville on this latest trip was intense. It started almost immediately with two Guinness Draughts and four Long Island iced teas while I watched my friends play pool. I didn’t participate in the contest because I was enjoying my own game of drown the writer in the dark and dingy corner of smoke and neon light. It is a one-player game but the odds are always steep and the challenge is never dull. Needless to say, I won the bout and went on to fight in other bouts in other venues for the remainder of the 48 hour tournament.

The weekend wasn’t all about completely succumbing to vices however. I mean, I never came across any other substances to entertain myself with and that’s fine, the booze was enough. I did get to spend a lot of the time talking politics and economics with the college kids, some of them a part of the Occupy Gainesville movement. Now while we didn’t see eye-to-eye on solutions, we did agree on the vast majority of the problems. My job, from my standpoint, was to try and get them to understand that you can’t just blame the banks for the madness. The government is just as responsible as is the Federal Reserve. Truth is, they were really receptive to a lot of the things I was saying. Now I had half a dozen conversations with a dozen or more people but for the most part, other than two or three close-minded joiners, they got what I was saying and left the conversations with the intent to look into their new perspective on these matters themselves. One of them even promised to pick up some of the books I wrote down for him on a napkin (titles by Ron Paul, Murray Rothbard, Ludwig von Mises, F.A. Hayek, Henry Hazlitt, Milton Friedman and more modern authors Jeffrey Tucker and Stefan Molyneux – who has a ton of free e-books).

One interesting thing I discovered among talking to multiple college kids, is that their only real beef with Ron Paul is his pro-life stance. I told them that it is an issue I also disagree with Dr. Paul on. However, I told them that if you look at the rest of his platform and like it, writing him off over one issue is a bit careless. Especially since Dr. Paul thinks that it should be an issue left up to states and not the federal government regardless of his personal opinion on it. Most of these kids understood that but had a hard time envisioning a country were states’ rights were protected, at least on this issue. I explained that you cannot pick and choose issues and that the rule had to apply with everything. If you make one exception, you will make plenty more. They got and respected it but still had a bug in their ass about it and I get that. I then spoke to them about Gary Johnson who is basically a clone of Ron Paul policy-wise but is pro-choice instead of pro-life. Most of the people I talked to had not heard of Johnson and were actually pretty excited upon finding out his stance on the abortion issue. They also liked that Gary Johnson was not a Democrat or a Republican. I didn’t bring up all the issues they said they had with Obama however, as there were a lot more than what they had with Paul. Regardless of this, they will probably vote for Obama again even though they claim they are opposed to war, Gitmo and a plethora of other issues he has failed them on.

Now don’t get me wrong, not everyone was cordial. There were those few dumb bastards in the mix and fucking with them and sending them off in a self-conlficted rage was quite amusing. One kid was calling for anarchy and at the same time was calling for government to step in and regulate the banks more. Point is, this kid’s whole world-view was completely hypocritical. On one hand, this kid (and those like him) want to scream “Fuck the man!” and “Fuck the police!” while on the other hand want the government (the man and the police) to step in and regulate everything even more than they do now. I don’t understand how so many young people can’t seem to make a correlation between these two things? You want the government who is bought and paid for by the banks to regulate the banks? You can’t see how this is completely asinine, let alone how this is what has caused all these problems to begin with? Your solution to the problem is more of the problem itself? Does the meth addict break the cycle by taking more meth? No, the meth addict dies! Common sense is like a disease in the hipster socialist-anarchist psyche.

The ones who are so passionate in their ignorance don’t even care about the real crux of the problem. They want to continue to buy into their conflicted and hypocritical indoctrination and smash anyone who doesn’t swim in their sea of shit. On top of that, they don’t want to better themselves, they want to stay at the bottom so they can continue to bitch as they wallow in dirt and filth because if they were to try and actually get out of it, they’d be outed as a “sell out” or even worse a “hard-working capitalist pig consumer”. Yep, keep pointing your Djarum-clutching fingers as you slur your PBR-soaked words kiddies.

Not all is lost on the generation after mine however. Amongst the sea of those I dealt with, only a few were bad apples and completely hopeless. I remember myself at that age, as I had a similar view of the world. It was someone challenging me on my preconceived notions that got me to pay attention and learn how this whole game really works. If at least one of those kids breaks free from the mold and is affected by our encounter, my debt is repaid. I enjoyed the friendly and civil debates and even had fun with the assholes. In the end, it is about standing your ground and living by your own code not the code of some undefined group whose ideology is lesser than the sum of its parts.

I got home, feeling pretty good about how most of the weekend went down. I also felt great for ignoring my responsibilities for a few days while not even paying attention to what was going on in the news. I didn’t really miss anything, other than Rick Santorum finally wiping away his bitch tears to endorse Mitt Romney, which just gave me flashbacks to 2008 when he was riding that Romney train hard. Something tells me that if I had the same debates with Santorum supporters that I had with the college youth of Gainesville, it wouldn’t have been as civil. I hope that all of those sweater-vests the Santorumites bought up like quaaludes at a disco are constructed of Iranian dog hair and Chinese asbestos. It would be the perfect ending to such a vile group of people.

*Written by Rob Rimes.

I barely have time to write this essay or whatever you want to officially call it, just as I haven’t had much time to write anything lately. Right now I am trying to finish up a few projects for work while packing and prepping for my long weekend trip to Gainesville. I’m going up there to visit my cousin and his college aged friends – some in school, some not. The booze will be aplenty and the party atmosphere should be monolithic, as that wild college town never fails to disappoint in the realm of pure debauchery and substance-enchanced frenzies. Between the usually free-spirited and good-hearted college kids encompassing downtown and the campus areas to the good ol’ boys on the outskirts of the concentrated action, trouble is something hard for one to avoid when the ante is upped and the whiskey is flowing. The only thing that can stop such fun-filled insanity is one of those damned Sunday nights when you are ill-prepared and find yourself out of alcohol in a county that decides to go dry for twenty-four hours during the Deep South’s weekly church day. Last trip, I found myself and a few of my cousin’s friends driving frantically through the dark North Central Florida wilderness in an effort to cross the county line and find anywhere that might have any sort of alcohol available for purchase. It was also a race against the clock as it was about closing time for most liquor stores in the state. Luckily, the mission was accomplished and we left with some fanciful artistic vanity beers, some PBR and a couple bottles of various 80 proof (or higher) swill.

This is probably what awaits me over the course of the next few days and I do need to get my shit together for the small vacation. However, I couldn’t resist sitting down at my temperamental Apple computer to type up my thoughts on the events of today. Hell, it isn’t even noon yet but the news is full of stories about the Paul Family. It’s a good day to be a Ron and Rand Paul supporter, as things are seemingly looking up in a few different ways.

To start, the Paul Revolution v2.0 is underway! Sure, I am really looking way ahead here but the younger Dr. Paul is doing all the right things and going against the grain so successfully that the media cannot ignore him. He is sticking out like a sore thumb against a backdrop of middle fingers. He isn’t playing the party politics game and isn’t succumbing to the Beltway bullshit while the vast majority of all the other Tea Party darlings have auctioned off their souls. In fact, Rand Paul probably pisses the Tea Party people off as they are really just grassroots establishment stooges at this point in the game. He is the antithesis to their heroes Marco Rubio, Michele Bachmann, Col. Allen West, Herman Cain, Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich and now Mitt Romney. Rand Paul recognizes the tyranny that is running rampant due to the PATRIOT Act and NDAA. He knows that the Department of Homeland Security is an over-inflated branch of the government that assaults our constitutional rights. He doesn’t try to convince himself that he must surrender his principles to fear and embrace the ever-expanding police state. As a senator and a direct victim of the TSA’s special brand of tyranny, he knows all too well how far their big brother fingers reach into the heart of liberty.

Rand Paul has officially made it his mission to end the TSA and to free the heart of liberty from their death grip. Like most Americans, Rand is tired of the harassment and horrible treatment of American citizens at the hands of these tyrannical bottom-feeders. Ultimately, he is sick and tired of the horrendous violations against our constitutional rights. To combat the tyranny, he has come forward with new legislation simply called the ‘END the TSA Bill’. You can actually sign a petition in support of the bill at ChooseLiberty.org.

In a nutshell, this law would forcibly privatize the TSA. What that means is that the government would not be able to put their hands on airport security. By privatizing the TSA, it doesn’t end airport security, it opens up competition from all over to come in and compete for the job. In order for the TSA to survive, it would have to adapt to the will of the people and the business owners (i.e. the airports and airlines) or else it would be swallowed up by a competitor that would. This brings the free market into airport security and therefore allows a company that is willing to find the balance between actually effective security practices and respecting the rights of those who pass through their gates. It is a win/win scenario for the citizens, the airports, the airlines and the company that is able to provide the absolute best service. If this scares you than don’t worry, I’m sure your other war-mongering fear turtle Tea Party darlings will strike it down. Ultimately, that is the real problem here and until we get other men and women in Congress who have the sense of Dr. Paul Sr. and Dr. Paul Jr., championing freedom back into our lives will be futile. However, it’s not all bad as the Paul Family message is growing larger everyday.

The second thing worth mentioning is the fact that even though it is pretty clear that Mitt Romney is going to go head-to-head with Obama in November, Ron Paul is still in this thing – making the GOP side of things very interesting. It is a two-man race between Ron Paul and Mitt Romney as every other candidate in this thing has dropped out to sign book deals and television contracts. The two-man race between Paul and Romney was made official today, as even Fox News couldn’t continue their blackout. Nope, Fox News announced that Ron Paul has officially qualified to be able to be the Republican nominee for president, if they decide to choose him over Romney (they won’t). This pivotal point in the race will take place at the Republican National Convention coming up in a few months in Tampa, FL.

Ron Paul has stayed in through thick and thin and has now met all the requirements for his name to be put up there alongside frontrunner Mitt Romney. I guess his delegate-hunting tactic has worked and paid off. This is great news, not because he has a chance of winning at this point – I firmly believe he doesn’t, but because he will be at the convention – in front of the world and will have the opportunity to spread his message further into the minds of all the Americans preparing for the big race between two big government progressive hyenas laughing at those who believe that there is some sort of difference between the two of them: there isn’t.

This could be Ron Paul’s Reagan moment. Like Ronald Reagan’s speech at the 1964 Republican National Convention, where Barry Goldwater won the nomination, Paul’s speech could unleash a tsunami wave of pro-liberty thinking. Sure, it is too little too late for the elder Dr. Paul, as he is walking away from politics after this election, but his son could be set up to take the reigns from his father and push this message forward with youthful vigor and vigilance for decades to come! One can only hope that generations of Pauls continue to follow the path of Ron and Rand and keep giving us a legacy of liberty that isn’t willing to compromise with the beast to save face and further their careers by sacrificing their principles. This brings me to my next point.

Rand Paul has a serious ball that he can pick up and run with. His father has done a fantastic job of laying the groundwork for the next generation to use to their advantage. Maybe this has been the Paul family agenda all along; who knows? The point is, the foundation has been built and it is pretty fucking strong. Guys like Rand Paul, Justin Amash and Gary Johnson could use this to their advantage and really our advantage as well. I don’t think that this is the year for Gary Johnson but the future could be very bright for him as well as the younger Paul and Congressman Amash. In 2016 or 2020, we could have a real pro-constitutional candidate in the mix who has enough steam and power to bulldoze through the establishment competition. If the momentum of the Paul message continues, the people just may be ready to commit and see this thing through. The numbers could very well be to the advantage of truth and for the first time in a very long time, America could move in the right direction. That is, of course, if the current crop of politicians don’t completely burn DC to the ground.

I know that I have come across as overly pessimistic at times in my writings, especially as of late, but it is hard to not give up hope when the hole you are in is so deep that you can’t even see the surface above you anymore. Maybe everything will crash and burn and at this rate, it is the most likely outcome but even if this does happen, we still need the type of leaders that can get us out of all this. Eventually the damage may be so bad that the only thing we can do is rebuild from the ground up. We will all pay for the crimes committed from those we elected and truthfully, we deserve to pay the price of our own ignorance and blindness. Our complete lack of vigilance and our blind faith in political parties has been our downfall. You can continue to point the finger at Washington DC, the Federal Reserve, Wall Street or whoever else but the truth is, American citizens are the ones who are at fault. The longer we assume that government will take responsibility for our lives and our well-being, the longer we will have to live with our heads in the clouds as shivering weaklings unworthy of walking on the same soil as our Founding Fathers. Until we overcome our own denial we won’t overcome our own self-perpetuating tragedy. The bull is staring coldly into our eyes, right in front of our goddamned faces but we aren’t grabbing the fucking horns! Why?!

This isn’t a dose of pessimism, it’s a dose of realism. With that said, to be real, I feel the need to point out that, in this case, the proverbial “beacon of light that guides freedom-loving people everywhere” could just be Senator Rand Paul. An article I came across on Business Insider’s website this morning talks about Rand’s potential 2016 or 2020 presidential run and how he is already working towards building a solid relationship with many of the key people that can help him reach levels greater than his father. Hell, the Evangelical sect of the voting public is taking to the younger Paul even though historically, they have not been too supportive of his father. Christian TV producer Justin Machacek said it best when comparing Rand to his father:

From my perspective, Rand is certainly more popular. I think he’s from a younger generation and I think he speaks a more modern language. He’s easier to understand, so I think his message is much clearer. Not that it’s a different message from a policy standpoint, but I think his communication style resonates much better.

Things are looking up for the Paul legacy, despite whatever the horrible results of the 2012 election will be, and if the right people are won over before the next election cycle and the message of constitutionalism continues to expand, the future could be bright. Of course, playing devil’s advocate, this is assuming that the Republican Party can actually change or that a third party could actually rise to challenge the two party monopoly. As hopeless as it seems, it’s very much possible if we want it badly enough.

Now grab the fucking horns.

*Written by Rob Rimes.

Yesss! This absurd presidential race has finally come close to an official end! Newt Gingrich, like Rick Santorum two weeks prior, has dropped out of the race. It couldn’t have come at a better time for the man who looks like the 60-something version of Chucky the killer Good Guy doll. Considering that Mitt Romney swept five out of five states last night, Newt knew his days were numbered and decided that it was best to step out of the Romney steamroller’s way and to stop embarrassing himself. Don’t get me wrong, I like Newt as a personality and he brought some real fire to this long-winded and nearly endless contest. He was a good contender for the establishment neocons who pretty much dominate the Republican Party and whether you love him or hate him, he would’ve really been a thorn in Obama’s side if they had gotten the chance to debate. Granted, Gingrich like his neocon counterparts wouldn’t be that far off from Obama on most issues but their bouts would have been entertaining nonetheless and there most assuredly would’ve been a lot of low blows, illegal headbutts and busted faces. That’s a dream match us boxing fans won’t get to see.

Now with the man named after a slimy amphibious lizard creature out of the way, this is truly a two-man race now. Dr. Ron Paul still refuses to go away quietly and thank fuck for that. Frankly, Dr. Paul is going to now soak up all the delegates Mitt Romney has missed on his quest for the American throne. Can Paul win? Not at this point but his strategy of delegate collecting is working. I was doubtful about it but he outlasted everyone but the dominate frontrunner and now has the opportunity to excel further in an effort to take his message of liberty to an even higher level.

Unfortunately for Ron Paul, I don’t think that the media gives a shit (surprise! surprise!) and the people just aren’t listening. The Tea Party isn’t really partying anymore and even if they still gave two shits, they’re brains have been replaced with neocon-flavored slushy. The anti-Romney non-party-affiliated Tea Party is now unified behind the Republican Party candidate. Personally, I am fine with that though, us true Dr. Paul supporters saw that ship sinking as soon as Sarah Palin showed up to the party and spiked the tea. I’ve already tackled most of these points however and it should be apparent to everyone that the Tea Party has pretty much always been the Republicans’ grassroots machine even though it claimed vehemently that it wasn’t. What’s that old saying? Oh yes, “The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was to convince the world he didn’t exist.” Well, the greatest trick the Tea Party ever pulled was to convince its members that they weren’t establishment Republican sheep. It doesn’t matter though, they don’t care either way whether they’ve been fully exposed or not. Honestly, even if they were down with the rhetoric they espoused, they still weren’t hardcore enough for me. As far as I am concerned, fuck’m all – bring the anarchy! Why wait for the shit to really hit the fan, let’s tear shit up now and get to rebuilding. It’s time to tear this elephant-sized band-aid the fuck off!

Sorry, I’m just completely fucking disgusted and tired of waiting for America’s slow death.

So this is where we are at. He have Romney and Obama going head-to-head with Paul and Johnson somewhere off to the side trying to remind us all why we are completely fucked. Romney’s wins in Connecticut, Delaware, New York, Pennsylvania and Rhode Island were just five more bitter nails in the coffin that is sealing away liberty, freedom and prosperity. Mr. Romney and Mr. Obama are just standing there with shovels waiting to start burying the American Dream under six feet of worm-filled dirt. If that doesn’t anger you and make you wake up to the fact that we are going to lose big this year, then you are one of the bumbling fools that handed them the shovels to begin with.

Now Newt Gingrich, who was one of the half dozen or so anti-Romney candidates that really isn’t all that different from Ol’ Mittens, has now come out and endorsed the man who was his rival over the last ten-to-twelve months. Newtie Booty told the GOP faithful that it is time for the party to unite and stand strong behind Mitt Romney so that “Anybody but Obama” can take the White House in November. I love how all the establishment candidates who were the Tea Party’s antithesis to the other establishment candidate are all out supporting him now. Well, all of them other than Rick Santorum who is still swimming in a sea of his own infantile tears and anal juice because he just can’t stop licking his baby bitch wounds. That man couldn’t fade into obscurity any faster. Hopefully he never returns to the fold and I can one day laugh when VH1 features him on an episode of the future show “I Love the 10′s”.

Back to Newt. He’s gone, the world is better off and now he can sign whatever big contract he wants to star on whatever large mainstream media outlet that will compete for his services. He’s too charismatic and sharp to just disappear and I’m sure we will see the man on our screens for years to come. Honestly, I am fine with that. I don’t agree with him on a great many things but I don’t find him offensive or stupid, as I find most of the other GOPers who have already fallen like a herd of fainting goats. I honestly wish Newt the best and I like him being in the public eye. I once really disliked the man but he was a great debater and if there is any truth to how he feels about the Federal Reserve, he can’t be all awful, right?

Then again, there are a hell of a lot more negatives than positives with this guy, so fuck everything I just said. Fuck Newt, fuck Romney and fuck the establishment for once again turning their backs on the one guy who could get us out of this mess and actually beat President Obama. It’s been a long race thus far but we’re finally on the last leg of this marathon.

Now we’re left with Godzilla versus King Kong. Whoever destroys America first is the winner!

*Written by Rob Rimes.

Anybody but Obama! That has been the mantra shouted out by Republicans and Tea Partiers all over America for quite some time now. The reality pill that no one on the right is willing to swallow that I myself took a double dose of a few years ago is that the two groups are really just one in the same. Sure, the Tea Party talks a big game and I really wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt.. no, I really did. However, this 2012 election cycle on top of their complete lack of real vigilance after their hollow midterm victory in 2010 has just gone on to prove my worst fears about these “non-partisan” big talking “fiscal” conservative hacks.

So as I type this while sitting at the bar in my favorite local Irish pub, I must reflect on the incident that inspired this article. You see, it was just this past Saturday that my local chapter of the Tea Party decided to hold an event in an effort to celebrate Tax Day. By “celebrate”, I mean bitching and moaning about crazy spending and government waste while trying to sound like true fiscal warriors out to chop off the heads of our big government leviathan. Now I didn’t attend this Tea Party and truth be told, I haven’t gone to one in well over a year because I just don’t see the point in trying to parade around with those who are primarily hypocrites and blind to the fact that their actions have a stark contrast to their rhetoric. Honestly, I’d rather spend my afternoon eating ribs and going to a bar to work on my writing in an effort to really bring forth some change in this country or at least give some ammunition to the hundreds of thousands who read my words regularly. I did witness the latest installment of the angry Anti-Obamanoids however and I can’t not share what I saw and my thoughts on it and the whole Tea Party movement in general at this point.

I tried to blow passed them but I couldn’t help but slow down my car and gawk at the ludicrous display, as I rolled by the event on my way to the local barbecue joint. My how the mighty have fallen in just a short short time. The saddest part, and I can only speak about my local chapter, is it looks like the numbers of participants has dwindled from where it was just two years ago. It was kind of sad actually. In what is a pivotal election year, participation at this rally was nowhere near the magnitude of the monstrous rallies that were spread across America leading up to the 2010 midterm elections. It’s like two-thirds of the Tea Partiers were satisfied enough with the Republicans taking back the House of Representatives that this much bigger election doesn’t even matter. This lack of participation has been apparent in the fact that the number of people voting has been down quite consistently across all the primaries from just four years ago when Obama bitchslapped McCain and his Alaskan parrot.

Then again, maybe those two-thirds that seem to be missing are of a much smarter stock and have decided to abandon the hopeless Tea Party crusade as I have. Maybe, just maybe, they see the forest for the trees and understand that this “Anybody but Obama!” mantra is complete and utter bullshit! Yes, Obama is shit as president and this isn’t in any way being written in defense of him but to think that anyone could just walk onto the job and do better is fucking moronic and completely careless. It just goes to show how clueless a lot of these damn dolts are. The fact that the roadside was decorated with Mitt Romney signs further proves my point.

You see, even just a few months ago, these Tea Party people – while screaming, “Anybody but Obama!” – were adamantly opposed to Mitt Romney. These tea-sippin’ geniuses clung onto every other candidate that wasn’t Romney in an effort to get someone to the top of the heap. Then again, for the most part, the vast majority of the Tea Partiers didn’t give Ron Paul a real shot at the top. Everyone else got their day though: Rick Perry, Michele Bachmann, Herman Cain, Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum. Hell, even Jon Huntsman gained some key delegates early in the voting process. However, during this long and arduous game of pass the hot potato, no one gave it to the only guy who actually practices what these hypocritical hobbits preach. Again, as I’ve pointed this out countless times, Dr. Paul gave birth to the Tea Party but the group that exists now is just the Tea Party In Name Only. So I guess “Anybody but Obama!” doesn’t include the only guy who could statistically beat Obama. This is why Republicans continue to fail and why the Tea Party is deader than shit.

These people don’t want a real solution to the things that they bitch and complain about. What they want is for a Republican victory over the Democratic led progressive machine. I guess the fact that the guy that all these anti-Obamanoids are now rallying around is also a progressive doesn’t really seem to matter. You see, these people are the establishment and they are a part of the problem. Their goal is soulless and their aim is bullshit. Now that the smoke is starting to clear, these people are lining up behind Mitt Romney, the guy they all talked shit about for years. The same guy who provided the model for Obamacare in Romneycare. You know, Obamacare – the issue that got these people so up in arms just 24 months ago!

So why do they now support this guy? Because the Tea Party has been co-opted and taken over by sheep and shepherds who don’t understand that they are really just sheep as well. These people, who are typically glued to the O’Reilly Factor and Rush Limbaugh day-to-fucking-day, don’t have the aptitude for politics that they believe they do. They’re malleable idiots being shaped and formed by the pontificating jackturds who speak to them from the other side of a speaker or screen where the words they utter are manufactured by a sinister agenda fueled by corporatist pigs and an unrelenting all-too-powerful two party system. This isn’t conspiracy theorist lunacy, it is facts – plain and simple. To deny it only solidifies your ignorance. To not question everything and educate yourself just shows that you give way too much trust over to people you do not know who only have their own best interests at heart. And this just really goes back to my earlier comment about the Tea Party’s complete lack of real vigilance.

If the Tea Party was as vigilant as they claimed they were and if they stood for the principles plastered across their signs, they’d have already put several of their heroes’ feet to the fire. I don’t have to look much further than my own state of Florida to give examples of Tea Party sweethearts who have proven to be nothing more than progressive neocon establishment bitches. Marco Rubio, a senator from Florida who many Tea Partiers want to run alongside Romney, has been fiscally irresponsible, supported unconstitutional war, tried to limit the freedom of speech, supported pro-police state legislation across the board and committed many other heinous acts that should completely disqualify him from being a Tea Party superstar. Allen West, a Florida congressman, has also voted almost consistently in-line with Rubio while sitting on the House side of Congress. Then there’s Michele Bachmann, who is just a complete mess and a retched dingbat, as well as Herman Cain who proved that giving deals on pizza toppings doesn’t make you knowledgeable enough to become president. The long list of Tea Party politicians that stormed the steps of Congress two years ago have gone on to perpetuate the madness they ran against while still gaining the approval of the intellectually lazy Tea Party majority.

As I drove by the event this past Saturday, I did notice a few young people holding up a giant Ron Paul banner. Those kids get my respect and at least there are a few sane people left in a sea of bad apples. While their valiant effort was dwarfed by the overabundance of Romney propaganda, they did look like the only people there who were actually enjoying themselves. Then again, the ex-soccer moms and their obedient husbands, whose kids are now adults and moved out of the house, did show a wee bit of energy waving their “Anybody but Obama!” signs from the comfort of their overpriced and overly-stylized lawn chairs. They probably don’t want to overexert themselves like the three youngsters with the Ron Paul banner however, as their senior entitlements may soon run dry. Who’s fault is that really?

I understand that there are people, some who I am still friends with, that feel it is necessary to play this Tea Party game. The truth is, it’s a waste of time. The real movement is dead and has been dead for quite awhile. Even if it could magically be brought back to its early glory, it would still be associated with the Tea Party name and just like the words “liberal” and “conservative” before it, the name “Tea Party” has been so bastardized and abused that there is no coming back from the shitty abyss it has sunk to. Fuck these giant corporately co-opted groups. It’s time for people to be self-educated, self-starting, self-thinking individuals again and let the bullshit die. Find your own path and don’t be swayed and if you come across those who share your principles and your beliefs, embrace them. Just stay truly vigilant and don’t let them piss all over the dream and leave it a urine-soaked carcass not even worthy of being kicked around for sport. At least the Occupy Wall Street movement had the sense to tell corporate sponsorship to fuck off. With that, they get more respect from me than the Tea Party, who has continually compromised their principles and values because one really doesn’t have those things when they are just adopted from what some billionaire pundit has dictated to his obedient flock.

If you people were really worried about the state of this country, you’d do something about it. Something real, something that actually mattered! However, that starts with getting off of your asses and doing your own self-educating. And yes, I’m talking to all you people with stacks of books with the names Beck, O’Reilly, Limbaugh, Levin, Savage, Coulter, Ingraham and Hannity scrawled across their spines. Maybe it’s time to trade those in for books with the names Mises, Rothbard, Hazlitt, Hayek, Friedman, Sowell, Rockwell and Paul on them. What’s the worst that could happen? You might actually learn something, gain my respect and be a lot less of a fucking tool.

*Written by Rob Rimes.

I’ve been putting off writing this all morning, as I’ve been sucked into the Internet’s new infant beast Pinterest. Damn that website for wasting half of my day! One thing I learned from it very quickly is that it is really easy for anyone to follow you and re-pin your posts. I guess that is good for those wanting exposure and needing to feel some sort of artificial love from strangers stalking them. Actually, it reminds me of about 80 percent of my ex-girlfriends. Anyway, moving on!

My predictions for last night’s shit show was two-thirds correct. I said that Romney would win Maryland and DC while bitch-tears Santorum would take Wisconsin. Well, I was wrong about Wisconsin as Mitt Romney swept all three primaries – sticking it to Rick Santorum hard and pretty much solidifying the fact that Mr. Santorum will soon be out of the race and shipped back to his own personal hell. Well, at least I was right about Ron Paul getting second place in DC. That doesn’t even matter though, as the winner takes all of the delegates there and Romney won the thing with a whopping 71 percent!

So the delegate count after these three contests is as follows: Mitt Romney now has a staggering 654 delegates compared to Santorum’s 270, Gingrich’s 137 and Paul’s 71. Romney is well over the halfway mark in earning the magic number of delegates required to win the Republican nomination. So is this whole thing coming to an end finally?

Hell no it’s not! Rick Santorum just won’t go away and he will continue to bitch, whine and throw temper tantrums until the Republican Party finally sends him packing in disgrace. Honestly, that won’t matter anyway because in four years they’ll have him back and probably make him the nominee going into a race where we will be slaughtered by whomever the Democratic candidate might be in 2016. Gingrich has cut a lot of his staff and believes that somehow a miracle will happen in a few months at the Republican National Convention which will propel him all the way up to the top where he’ll be the nominee. I could make a case against these guys for not bowing out gracefully and accepting their fate but then I’d also have to point that finger at Ron Paul, who is also staying in this race even though he’s currently dead last and yet to win a single state (even though Maine was stolen from him). Paul’s case is somewhat different however, as his presence in the race is about his message: the message of liberty.

Unlike the other losing candidates in this race, Dr. Paul is winning. Sure, he’s not winning the nomination per se but he is winning over the hearts and minds of millions of people and even if devious tricks, demonic sorcery and voter fraud prevent him from making as big of an impact in the delegates department as other candidates, his message hasn’t been stripped from the minds of those who support him and the principles he represents. Because of that, he won’t and can’t leave the race until the GOP makes their final decision. However, Santorum and Gingrich can fuck off for all I care and we’d all be in a better place if they did. Now I am not saying that Romney is any better than those two but what’s done is done and he is going to run away with this thing regardless of how any of us feel about it or whatever tricks the other candidates may try to pull.

I just wish this race would hurry up and be over. The Republicans just need to prop Romney up as their choice and send him off to get beat by Obama. I can’t believe that we have to wait until November for all of this to be over. I wish I had some words of hope to throw in the tail end of this article but I don’t. I’m going to go grab a cigar and some whiskey now, as I have better things to do than overanalyze the crap out of this race. I’ve spent the last several months trying to make sense out of madness and I’m over it. Plus, I have a fucking migraine.

*Written by Rob Rimes.

It’s that time again yet it feels like it’s that time again every couple of days. Tonight we get to witness more of America’s decaying sanity as “We the Sheeple” vote for either Mitt Romney or Rick Santorum across the board in three primaries. Now, I don’t know if that is going to happen but based off of the way things have gone down thus far, one can only assume. So expect some anger and dissatisfaction my loyal lovers of liberty because tonight will just be another episode of ‘Three Bastards and a Wizard’ streamed to you live from multiple corporate media channels in HD with Dolby Surround.

This race has been a slow and tortuous affair that seems to have no end in sight even though the outcome is pretty goddamned obvious at this point. Between the hardcore and unrelenting mainstream media bias as well as the blatant and documented accounts of voter fraud, the primaries in Wisconsin, Maryland and the District of Columbia will certainly be no different. Hell, DC is where the establishment den of vipers holds court and Maryland is just a part of the twisted and sick Capital Beltway, so I expect a special breed of shenanigans to take place in these contests. I’d hate to put the citizens as a whole, of these two places, on the chopping block and I recognize that many of them are going to do the right thing today but I do not put it passed their leaders to have stacks upon stacks of aces hidden up their slimy sleeves. Am I being pessimistic? Fuck no, I am being realistic and to not expect the schemers to be on their “A” game after what has happened in the GOP primary thus far is irresponsible and shows a complete lack of awareness. Be vigilant people!

So let’s look at what we are facing tonight.

Wisconsin is the state that has the most delegates at stake tonight with 42, Maryland has 37 delegates on the line and Washington DC has 19. This is a total of 92 delegates which is just under 10 percent of the big number needed to win the Republican Party’s nomination. Wisconsin and Maryland will give out their delegates proportionally based off of the votes, whereas the District of Columbia is a “winner-takes-all” situation. My prediction is that Santorum will take Wisconsin and Romney will take Maryland and DC. I could potentially see Paul come in second in DC but then again, those people are constantly in an irate frenzy and they certainly love their statist lifestyle. The youth vote could make a difference but the DC youth is really Barack Obama’s to manipulate and control.

Truth be told, it doesn’t really matter what happens tonight as it will just continue the craziness that is modern politics. We are on a runaway train of economic and social genocide about to go over the police state cliff and into a large maelstrom that will be the end to everything we know. It’s all coming to a head and whether we are to be led by Obama, Romney or Santorum doesn’t matter. That’s like asking who would you rather have run Hell: Lucifer, Belial or Beelzebub?

So I don’t have much to add to this diatribe of distaste for our current and probably ongoing situation in America. I have to go to lunch, as I am starved due to my miniscule breakfast of half a bagel, and can’t really stomach any more of this bullshit. I will however give my two cents on the results of these particular primaries tomorrow. Here’s a spoiler alert for you: I will probably be pissed off. I’d pray for a miracle but Jesus doesn’t listen and, if he does exist, probably thinks that all this is hilarious. We really are God’s ant farm. I just wish the omnipotent bastard would shake us up every once in awhile. Then again, I guess it is more sadistic to sit back and watch us ruin ourselves.

*Written by Rob Rimes.

What the hell happened last night? No, I am not talking about some sort of development in the 2012 Republican primary, that’s basically over at this point. I am talking about this damn nausea and the monster sized jackhammer wrapped in flashing bright lights and obnoxious dubstep that is blasting through the thin rock-like structure of my skull right now!! Where the hell was that hotel room I found myself in this morning? What was that sticky mass all over the floor and as I woke up in it, what the hell was that that I saw under the bed: a slightly large syringe or a slightly small baster? Do I really want to know either way? What’s with the fucking reggae blaring outside the window, it’s 6:30 in the goddamned morning! Forty-five minutes later, why the hell am I sitting in the Naples-Ft. Myers Greyhound Track parking lot with my MacBook Pro burning my legs, as I type out this strange train of random chemically influenced thoughts? My bagel tastes like shit, my head feels like it was raped by a dozen raging elephant cocks in a sexual repressed frenzy and I keep feeling like I need to puke but so far I’ve just had a few dry heaves – I guess I got it all out somewhere on the beach last night. The truth is, there isn’t a better time to write than now.

Reflecting on the events that brought me to this place, I feel that maybe I shouldn’t party so hard during the week. Then again, everything that has come from my seemingly careless actions have only contradicted this theory. You see, every boss in my company is in Mexico this week and therefore I have had no distractions at the office from an administrative standpoint. No meetings, no meetings about what to talk about in future meetings and no meetings to talk about what we’ve talked about in previous meetings – all of which has something to do with wide-receivers and debating over lunch options. I have actually got to do some real work this week and because of that, have created some pretty amazing shit. For those who don’t know, I am the Art Director for a major cigar manufacturer, which company is insignificant but a Google search will probably destroy my anonymity. Now considering that my boss has decided to release about eight dozen new brands at this year’s biggest trade show, I am expected to magically pull creative miracles out of my urethra on a whim. I’m certainly not complaining, this is what I do and the pay is sufficient; I’m also allowed certain freedoms at this job that I wouldn’t have elsewhere – which is why I have stayed for so long. This week has been pretty goddamned magical and even if the CEO hates my new concepts, I’m still in love with them and will fight for them as always, until my last breath or another big project that is made to seem more important than it actually is is dropped in my lap at the last minute with a deadline of three days prior.

Those times when I don’t write a lot are because of the strenuous demands of my well-paying job. Which makes me appreciate the fact that the Republican primary is just about over and I can go back to focusing fully on my real job, as the busiest time of the year for the creative side of this business, is creeping up on me. Writing about politics doesn’t really have a negative impact on my performance at my job, it actually seems to work in the opposite, as days upon days of conceptualizing something as insignificant to the real world as a cigar band can cause one’s brain to either erupt in colorful vulgar madness or completely shutdown. I do however find some senseless motivation in assisting the universe in putting more nails into Rick Santorum’s coffin and really, setting the bastards of this universe on fire is gratifying in a way that I will continue to do it without money on the table. However, getting a paycheck for it would be nice and ultimately, would be much more preferable than my current line of paid employment, as I could focus on rattling cages full-time.

The opportunity I have been waiting for, fell into my lap a few weekends ago. Now I was instructed not to write about this and I said that I wouldn’t until the election was over. These egomaniacal assholes probably assumed that I meant November but I didn’t specify and since the candidate that they work for is pretty much done at this point, his election is most assuredly over. Now I may look like a devious trickster here and I did give them my word to a degree, which I do hold my word true, but pure unadulterated truth is much more important in this case as I have always believed in free speech and in transparency. What they wanted me to do was to compromise my principles where those two things are concerned, which immediately threw up a red flag and made me go into the mode of playing along to see what exactly it was that these schemers had up their sleeves.

I was asked to breakfast, early on a Sunday morning at the last minute to meet with important people on the staff of a Republican presidential candidate. I will not say their names or the candidate’s, as I only want to shed light on the situation and who it was doesn’t matter; I am sure this is standard practice amongst the leeches and vampires. Besides, the meeting was quick, as they learned almost immediately that I wasn’t going to play ball for them.

The leader of the group introduced himself to me and as he did, I checked him out on my iPhone to see if he was legit: he was. He immediately tried to butter me up by talking about my website and my work. He said that he respected my stance on the issues and that was why he needed to meet with me. He knew my website stats to a tee and talked about how my articles have reached hundreds of thousands of people through Facebook and various political forums. He then brought up the fact that I was very biased for Ron Paul and because of that have gotten a lot of support and readership from other Paul supporters. Aha! The proverbial plot thickens!

The leader of the group asked me how their campaign could capitalize on Ron Paul’s “fall from grace” and gain the support of his loyal followers. I explained to him that when Paul was finally out of the race, his supporters would either walk away, write “Ron Paul” on their ballots in November or vote for Gary Johnson of the Libertarian Party. This guy refused to accept that and insisted that there must be a way to win over the hearts of Paul supporters to get behind his candidate. I told him that it would never happen no matter what kind of dirty tricks that he had in mind. The man got pissed and a bit irate at this point, as he stared at me intently between bites of his blueberry pancakes. I had to bring him to the realization that even if you compiled all of Ron Paul’s delegates with his boss’ delegates, that the number was still dwarfed by the number of delegates Mitt Romney has amassed. I also made it clear that Barack Obama was going to get re-elected regardless of how the GOP contest concluded; this was the point where his face got about as purple as his pancakes.

Calming down and trying to regain his footing with me, this guy said that people can be “persuaded”. He then added that they can “especially be persuaded by the voices they trust”. What this shady bastard was trying to do, in a nutshell, was to get me to write an article calling for Paul supporters to shift their allegiance elsewhere, based off of the fact that Paul is a greyhound that can’t win in a race rigged to lose. What this guy couldn’t see through the blinding light of his massive holier-than-thou ego is that his boss has no chance in hell of winning but that isn’t even the point here. Now he never asked me to write something but it was heavily alluded to and he told me that there are a thousand writers like me out there who would jump at the opportunity to help their campaign succeed. While that could very possibly be true, I am not nor will I ever be one of those soulless creatures out to make a quick buck by surrendering my principles and lying to those whose loyal eyes scroll across my words and thank me by simply reposting my articles wherever they can.

The breakfast meeting was incredibly short and the guy was a complete jackoff. What I learned from this though, is how the media is bought and paid for at almost any level and how out of touch these big wig Washington insiders really are. This guy has no clue as to how any of this works and if he does, he certainly didn’t show it and only displayed what could be interpreted as pure arrogance and ignorance. In the end, they got up and left and I had to pay my own tab. I guess the part where I tore his business card in half really set him off. His parting words were, “Have fun scribbling on cigar boxes for the rest of your life.” Funny, because ten minutes earlier he told me, “We want you to work for us.” What I now believe, based off of this encounter, is that there are bloggers and writers who do work for them. As insignificant as I am to the bigger picture, this must be true and it is seemingly the job of men like these to round us up and bribe us into making things go their way.

So as I finish this, thighs charred from this damn laptop, I stare out at the dog track, as the sun rises behind me, and wonder if greyhound racing is as dirty as the most important race in America. Do those speedy mongrels on that track try underhanded devious tactics to get the edge on their competition or do they just race and hope for the best? Those animals were bred for pure competition and push themselves around that circle day in and day out and truth be told, every single one of them has more heart in their small chests than the vast majority of the mongrels in the race to the White House. Politics isn’t a sport, it’s just a beauty contest where the winner is chosen by how many cocks they fluff and how many corrupt corporatists they can convince to line their pockets. And hell, when that doesn’t work, some of that money trickles down into the pockets of those who can use the power of their words to change minds for the worse. It’s a vile, dishonest and disgusting tournament for jackals who would eat their own for one more go around that dirty track.

The best thing any of us can do, is to choose not to play their game.

*Written by Rob Rimes.

Finding myself flying down U.S. 41 in Naples, Florida yesterday had my mind racing. As VNV Nation’s song “Control” was blasting throughout my stock speakers and I was weaving in and out of a sea of giant Canadian turtles out for a Sunday drive, I found myself thinking about a lot of the news reports on Rick Santorum that have come out over the last few days. This whole Etch-A-sketch farce is laughable, as Mitt Romney’s aide’s now infamous gaffe, has been criticized by everyone from the lowest bottom-feeding liberal pundits all the way up to conservative presidential candidates Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum – who both brought Etch-A-Sketch toys to their most recent rallies. Personally, I don’t care about the mistake made by Eric Fehrnstrom, who has been by Romney’s side for decades now. People make mistakes and focusing too deeply on this is pointless. It was a stupid mishap on his part but when guys like Santorum and Gingrich are so desperate to overtake Romney, they of course have to make a big ass deal about it. As if these two haven’t put their big elephant sized feet in their mouths again and again. None of us are immune to making mistakes, however some of us continue to make blunder after blunder and with that said, Rick Santorum is the blunder master!

Hell, Rick Santorum, in trying to lambast Mitt for his campaign’s simple slip up, has actually committed worse gaffes than the Romney staff. However, the blind religious zealots, the Fox News zombies and the Tea Party hypocrites are seemingly blind to this man’s stupidity and his bratty whiney infantile nature. Rick Santorum, when under fire, is like the kid who lied to his parents and throws a fit when he’s caught – refusing to admit that he is a punk ass hellion. Emotionally, the man is a child and that alone makes him unqualified to hold any sort of public office, let alone the Oval Office.

In attacking the comments by Mr. Fehrnstrom, Rick Santorum came out and alluded to Barack Obama being better than Mitt Romney would be as president! Yes, this Republican idiot bashed the frontrunner of his own party in an effort to build himself up while tearing down his party and helping Barack Obama in the process. Rick Santorum truthfully doesn’t care about the GOP, he just cares about Rick Santorum and like the brat bastard he is, publicly throws tantrums to get his way. Unfortunately, unlike the typical brat bastard who throws a fit in Wal-Mart because mommy won’t buy him the new Green Ranger action figure, no one is there to put this ungrateful delinquent over their knee for an old school ass whoopin’. Shit, I’d make that pretentious little rascal climb the damn tree and pick out his own switch like my uncle used to do to me. For reference sake, here’s is Santorum’s exact quote:

Pick any other Republican in the country, he (Romney) is the worst Republican in the country to put up against Barack Obama.

It may not seem that bad at first glance but the underlying tone to the comment is pretty straightforward. Now while some in the liberal side of the media have been having a field day with this and rightfully so, the conservative side of the coin has basically ignored it. The Fox News jokesters continue to perpetuate this 2012 circus and probably can’t even see how their contribution to this presidential race is pulling apart the GOP and the country by the seams. So ignoring Fox News’ carelessness and incredibly biased “fair and balanced” reporting – not saying that other networks are fully off the hook here, at least some of the other mainstream media outlets have questioned Santorum’s remarks. And really, Santorum endorsed Romney in 2008! All this knowledge about Romneycare and Mitt’s questionable record were well known back then, so why the change and the anger and the rage? It’s because Rick is losing and he is panicking like the prettiest girl in school coming to the realization that she might not be prom queen.

So how has Ricky Baby responded to the criticism? Well, he has thrown even more tantrums! Do the conservative and religious sects of the voting public seem to notice? Nope, they still support the douchebag, which is confirmed by the fact that amongst all of his bitching, whining and temper tantrum madness he magically won the primary in Louisiana! How does this keep happening? Do people really want a weak infantile bastard leading them through some of the toughest times this country has ever faced? Was Mike Judge right and the events of ‘Idiocracy’ were some sort of prophetic vision of what’s to come? A person of sound mind would certainly have to think so, as the dumbing down of American society has never been more apparent. This country falling behind this man’s leadership would be like having Eric Cartman for president! If that thought doesn’t scare the shit out of you, congratulations – you are a fucking idiot.

Over the last few days, since making his stupid comment, Santorum has tried to backtrack and reiterate it into something else. In doing so, it just makes him look like more of a bratty bitch and less like a man who can own up to his own mistakes and move forward. In a fantastic turn of events, for those of us who would love to never see this moron’s mug again, he went off on a New York Times reporter just yesterday. When asked about his Romney comments which were correctly quoted, Santorum put on his angry baby face and threw a typical spineless and emotionally weak fit where he cursed publicly at a New York Times reporter. Santorum told the reporter who questioned him:

What speech did you listen to? Stop lying!.. ..Quit distorting my words. If I see it, it’s bullshit! C’mon man!

Here’s a clip of it:

I guess even compassionate Christian mouthpieces can have anger issues. Then again, his compassion is pretty much anti-gay and anti-everything that isn’t in line with theocratic fascism. I guess Kevin McCallister is still pissed that his parents left him “home alone”.. twice.

The point is, this guy is really the worst Republican candidate in the country. The man shouldn’t even be in this race and never has anyone, in my lifetime, been this ill-equipped to handle the pressure that is going to come with the job of POTUS. Santorum is already cracking and has been a punk ass bitch since he emerged from his mother’s womb and graced the world with his everlasting thin-skinned toddler rage.

Responding to Santorum’s recent conniption fits, Romney spokesperson Ryan Williams hit the nail on the head:

Rick Santorum is becoming more desperate and angry and unhinged every day…He’s panicking in the final stages of his campaign.

Williams is right and as this race winds down, it is apparent that Romney is running away with this thing and Santorum is being left in the dust. Thank the stars for that but as history has shown again and again, after four more years of Obama, it will be Santorum taking the GOP nomination in 2016. If that sounds crazy, just remember that the guy in second place always becomes the Republican Party’s candidate four years later. I hope that this is a trend that changes and truthfully, for Republicans to survive – it has to! Otherwise, the likelihood of a President Santorum could very well be a reality four years from now.

Don’t say that this whiskey-sipping fiend behind his MacBook Pro screen didn’t give you ample warning.

Bonus – Santorum at his most intellectual: