My Two Cents: Jerry Brown has actually done enough in one week to make him a Douchebag of the Year candidate. What a piece of shit this guy is! I can’t give him the award for one thing this week, I’m giving it to him for all three things, which makes him the FIRST triple douche of all-time! First, Jerry Brown makes it law that a 12-year-old can give their own consent to the government giving them Gardasil vaccinations without their parent knowing. Secondly, Jerry Brown vetoed a bill, which in doing so allows law enforcement to do on-the-spot warrantless searches of people’s cell phones. Lastly, Jerry Brown signs the DREAM Act thus giving away free tuition to illegal immigrants for college paid for by tax dollars. This guy is beyond abhorrent. End Two Cents.

My Two Cents: Seriously.. WTF is wrong with Brown? Enjoy your new governor Cali. End Two Cents.

*Taken from Prison Planet. Written by Mike Adams.

Insanity prevailed in California once again today as Governor Jerry Brown signed bill AB499 allowing 12-year-old children the ability to consent to being injected with Gardasil vaccines without their parents’ knowledge; yet at the same time the Governor banned the use of tanning beds by anyone under 18 unless they received parental consent (http://www.reuters.com/article/2011…).

For the record, HPV vaccines are widely linked to maiming and even killing countless children while contributing absolutely nothing to the body’s real defense of cervical cancer (http://www.naturalnews.com/031279_H…). The entire fabrication of quack science behind HPV vaccines is nothing but a corporation fantasy created to drum up sales for vaccines. In contrast to that, tanning beds have actually been scientifically shown to increase vitamin D levels in people who are deficient in vitamin D (http://www.naturalnews.com/024687_V…) — and that includes the vast majority of the population living in California.

CONTINUED..

*Taken from the American Dream.

The debate about Rick Perry and the HPV vaccine is a battle for the very soul of the Republican Party.  Right now, Rick Perry is parading around the country talking about how “conservative” he is, but would a real conservative attempt to forcibly vaccinate 12 year old girls for a sexually transmitted disease?  If Rick Perry really wants government to be as “inconsequential” in our lives as possible, then why did he issue an executive order that mandated that 12 year old girls in the state of Texas be injected with a highly controversial vaccine?  Rick Perry did not even consult the Texas legislature and he spat right in the face of parental rights when he did this.  Conservatives in the United States love to talk about how much they love individual liberty and about how much they love parental rights, but they keep supporting candidates that are trampling on our liberties and our freedoms.  Forcing young girls to be injected with a highly controversial government-mandated STD vaccine is something that we would expect Barack Obama to do.  Rick Perry keeps saying that he wishes he would “have done it differently”, but you will notice that he is not saying that he was wrong for trying to do it at all.  The really sad thing is that you have all kinds of “conservative Republicans”, “evangelical Christians” and “Tea Party activists” running around defending Rick Perry on the HPV vaccine issue.  All of those people should be absolutely ashamed of themselves.

Why in the world should we be injecting pre-teen girls with highly controversial vaccines that are supposed to “protect” them against the consequences of “unsafe sex” in the first place?

If Bill Clinton had tried to pull such a stunt, social conservatives would have had a field day.

CONTINUED..

*Written by Rob Rimes.

There are too many debates this month. This is the second of three and that’s not counting the Palmetto Freedom Forum that occurred just over a week ago. The candidates must be worn out and I can’t imagine how they’ll be feeling come the next debate, which is just a week away! All this hard work is paying off however, at least for my candidate Ron Paul. After the last two debates and the forum, his support has doubled: in less than two weeks! Is liberty shining through all the bullshit? Man, I fucking hope so!

Being the second CNN debate, I was a little worrisome, as last time I was assaulted by the throat gargling of John King. I was pretty hard on homeboy but that shit did get extremely annoying. Lucky for me, John King was a no show and we were treated to the the legendary prowess of Wolf Blitzer, who can be a douche at times but is still a much better choice to head this debate up than what I am assuming is Larry King’s little brother or son or possibly daughter.

Kicking off the debate is a video introduction that looks like they are introducing the Avengers. This summer blockbuster trailer is kind of cool, well until they get to Ron Paul. Everyone else looked powerful and badass but for Dr. Paul they picked a clip of him looking frail, leaning against a shelf. What the fuck man, can the the media hate for the libertarian guy be any more obvious? Fucking dickholes. Anyway, moving on.

So after the intro video of Earth’s mightiest heroes, Wolf Blitzer called them out one by one in what felt like wrestlers running to the ring at the Royal Rumble. However, none of them had any badass theme music. If I was producing this show, they’d all come out to some generic death metal. I do have to say, love him or hate him (I hate him), even without cool theme music, Rick Perry does look like a fucking president walking across that stage. Too bad he’s an evil bastard, then again most presidents have had a twinge of evil bastard in them.

Wolf introduces some chick to sing the national anthem. No offense but shouldn’t this have been done before the show? There hasn’t been a national anthem televised on any other debate, including the first CNN one, so why is it suddenly necessary? I’d rather have more times for questions. Also, this chick singing is pretty atrocious, not to say that I wouldn’t hit it though. Bachmann looks enthralled with her however. I can almost read Michele’s thoughts. She’s saying to herself, “I hope she ate the cheese platter I left her.” I bet Michele did leave her a cheese platter, she is a really nice motherly lady. Enough with this singer though, I’ve heard better from my drunk uncle Titus down at the Winghole on Karaoke Wednesdays.

Next up are the time-wasting introductions.. yawn. Can’t we just get to it already?! We’re thirteen minutes deep at this point! All I got from this was that Ron Paul promises to obey the Constitution and Newt gave a shout out to his homies in 9/12. Odd, considering it is actually 9/12.

Holy shit! Whoa! Stop the press! Wolf Blitzer didn’t start with Rick Perry or Mitt Romney! Are we seeing a change of the guard in the Golden Boy Club? The first question goes to golden girl Michele Bachmann, who isn’t as funny as Bea Arthur, at least not intentionally. The first subject is Social Security.

Michele basically says that she is down with Social Security because it was a promise made decades ago. Basically this pro-constitution fiscally responsible Tea Party darling is cool with socialism as long as it was delivered with a promise. Good job sticking to your guns lady.

Darth Perry who called Social Security a Ponzi scheme last debate, less than a week ago, is now backtracking on that statement. Homie must own more flip flops than Mitt. Perry goes as far as to say that it is “slam dunk guaranteed” that social security will be there for everyone if he is elected president. Romney and Perry then immediately start slapping each other like a couple of old ladies in the Jello line at the nursing home. I tune out mentally and take a big swig of my Stella Artois.

The only people offering real solutions to the Social Security problem are Herman Cain and Ron Paul. Last debate Cain mentioned that we should adopt the Chilean model for reforming Social Security but this debate, he actually has time to break it down for us. Cain’s already off to a great start this debate.

Holy shit, now Newt is on the bandwagon and pimping the Chilean model as well. As he speaks, he gets both cheers and boos and both very loudly. People either love or hate this guy. I’m not a fan policy-wise but I do enjoy his presence in these debates.

Somewhere in the middle of all this Social Security talk, Jon Huntsman refers to Mitt Romney as Kurt Cobain. His pop culture references are twenty years old. He tries to be funny but he fails. He should be on a bad CW buddy sitcom with Rick Santorum called “Just Dicks”.

Santorum speaks, no one cares. Where’s Gary Johnson?

The next part of the debate goes into the budget and general economics. As we face economic peril, these questions are some of the most important of the night. However, most of the answers given were shit.

Newt steps up first and talks about how there is too much waste in government and that by eliminating it we can come closer to balancing the budget. Yeah dude, that’s pretty much common sense and we all already know that. Those of you who aren’t aware of this should probably just go back to bed. Newt goes on to bash the Super Congress, which shouldn’t even exist and he calls for a modernization of the federal government.

Rick Santorum between fixing his racquets says that we need to adopt the Paul Ryan Plan. Most conservatives are on this bandwagon but the truth is, it doesn’t do much to alleviate the problem. Santorum doesn’t live in reality however and neither does anyone else pimping this plan.

Rick Perry is asked if he would cut drug prescription benefits and he says “no”. He obviously likes government spending the way it is. Rick Perry says whatever he needs to say to stay afloat. He is a professional panderer.

Romney promises to cut and cap spending and even wants a balanced budget amendment. Without an amendment the government can’t be fiscally responsible. I’m going to quit paying my bills and just use the excuse that I personally need an amendment to force me to stop buying whiskey, ties and pipe tobacco. Mittens also promises to completely restructure the economy and create jobs in the process. Sounds like sorcery!

Ron Paul says that he is looking for a lot of places to cut. He then goes on to pimp out his anti-war message and receives loud pops from the crowd. He talks about cutting funding to education, national security and energy. All these areas need to be looked at and seriously analyzed, as they suck up a huge portion of our budget. Bringing our damn troops home would also help the budget immensely.

Rick Perry starts regurgitating Tea Party talking points that he stole from a pamphlet he found lying next to the Port-O-Lets at the Tampa Fairgrounds. Huntsman promises to reform the tax code within his first 100 days. Bachmann pats herself on the back per usual and promises to repeal everything. Can we repeal ‘Avatar’ from being made? Can we at least repeal funding going to the production of any sequels? Herman Cain tells the world to go check his 999 Plan but he doesn’t mention the FairTax. I wonder if that is a part of his 999 Plan; I will have to give it a quick read over.

Mitt Romney then comes out and says that, “We are an energy rich nation living like an energy poor nation.” He also says that we’re in a smartphone world and not a payphone world and that Obama is still putting quarters in the payphone or something like that. All I can say is, “Fuck payphones!” Those things are dirty, grimy, germy and stinky. They also smell like hobo nut sweat. All this does though is lead to another spat between Romney and Perry and this one is full of weird poker references and extreme awkwardness by both candidates. Wolf Blitzer blushes when Rick Perry winks at him. Maybe I imagined that part. In any event, Wolf has some obvious man-love for the Texas Gub’ner.

Ron Paul destroys the man-love by pointing out the reality of Rick Perry’s record (I wrote about his record here). Dr. Paul points out that Perry has implemented higher taxes and created more debt in the process. Ron Paul peels back the layers and Perry, looking visibly uncomfortable, just makes wise cracks about Ron Paul. Truth is, the record Perry touts is bullshit. The media doesn’t care though, he’s dreamy!

The next subject to come up is the Federal Reserve. Oddly, not a single fucking question about the Fed or Ben Bernanke went to Ron Paul, who is the chairman of the U.S. House Financial Services Subcommittee on Domestic Monetary Policy. Basically, Ron Paul deals with Bernanke and the Fed on a daily basis! Yet, not a single fucking question went to the expert on the subject.

Former Federal Reserve employee Herman Cain was asked a question however. He was asked if the Fed should be audited. Cain who used to be against auditing the Federal Reserve now says that we should. He says that he doesn’t want to end the Fed but he does want to fix it. That’s not good enough for me, sorry homie.

Michele Bachmann says she would fire Ben Bernanke. Of course she would and so would everyone else up there because to say that you would keep him would be career suicide at this point. Everyone else pretty much says the same thing. Romney insists he will look into the Fed: no he won’t. Rick Perry does backtrack on his remark from two debates back where he called Ben Bernanke “treasonous”. Perry is backtracking and flippin’ the script like a little bitch this round. Starting to see a trend yet?

A young Tea Partier in the crowd asks “How much of my paycheck should I be allowed to keep?” It is a great question that should be asked to every single candidate on that stage, however Wolf Blitzer just asks Jon Huntsman: what a waste. Huntsman, the living embodiment of the politician stereotype, beats around the bush and never truly answers the question. One of the best questions of the night is thrown away like a used condom after sex with a Carson City hooker under an overpass.

A Tea Partier on the giant TV then asks about the FairTax and the question is given to Mitt Romney who doesn’t support it and tries to explain why. The problem is that Mitt obviously doesn’t understand the FairTax and how it works. He claims that it punishes the middle class. Nope dude.. it doesn’t. Go read one of the Boortz books or read any of the countless FairTax articles that are posted on FairTax.org and TheSwash.com. Wolf Blitzer is really good at picking the wrong people to ask specific questions. The audience members that got to participate in the debate were cheated.

Things really start to heat up in a good way when Ron Paul speaks out against the use of executive orders. Dr. Paul says that executive orders should never be used for legislation and that anyone who uses them to make law is not working within the frame of the Constitution. Ron Paul then points out that it was Rick Perry who abused the executive order power in trying to force teen girls to get vaccinated. Rick Perry once again looks uncomfortable and can’t effectively dig himself out of this hole. How could he? There is no excuse for this even though too many people are turning a blind eye to it or somehow accepting it and forgetting it.

Perry tries to get out of the hole by saying he’d use his executive order powers as president to repeal Obamacare. This fucksack just can’t face the goddamned music. Bachmann gets really pissed and informs the idiot Perry that you can’t just repeal it with an executive order, he needs to learn how this shit works. She then goes on and on about parental rights and how Perry violated them and is pretty much an evil fucking bastard.

Of course Wolf Blitzer continually allows Perry to respond to every criticism, which isn’t a luxury that he has been giving to anyone else on the stage. Bachmann isn’t having any of Perry’s shit and she points out that he has close ties with Merck, the drug company behind the vaccination. I remember when I used to tell people this and they called me a “conspiracy nut”. Bachmann is bouncing back in this debate and showing that she’s not ready to leave the hunt.

Suddenly, Rick Santorum starts ripping Rick Perry a new asshole too! This is great. Santorum is an idiot douche but Darth Perry getting slammed has got me cheering on any and all comers that want to challenge the Sith bastard. Perry is crawling in his skin and it’s awesome to watch. Rick Perry literally pulls a shit sandwich out of his jacket pocket and takes a bite. Nomnomnom!

Health care is the next big issue and Herman Cain starts the discussion by saying that he wants to implement a “loser pays” law, as it would help eliminate bad lawsuits against doctors, thus eliminating the high cost of their liability insurance and thus the high cost of health care in general.

Ron Paul says that, “Freedom is about risk”. When it comes to health care it is a person’s responsibility to take care of themselves, just like anything else. However, he points out that the charitable nature of man wouldn’t just let people die in the streets. Being the only doctor on stage and having practiced medicine before all the medical entitlements, he tells us about how even before Medicare and Medicaid all the hospitals he worked in never turned people away. He also talked about how churches and other organizations would work to help the less fortunate as they do now, except they would be even more charitable if their hands weren’t tied due to the cost of health care and the restraints of the over-regulated system.

Some guy from Cincinnati asks the candidates what we should do ’bout all dem Messicans. The first to get on that is Rick Santorum who literally calls for “Stormtroopers” on the border! No, he really called for “Stormtroopers”! Apparently he also wants a super fence and a Death Star pointed at Mexico. Man, I thought Darth Perry was the Sith.

Rick Perry blames the federal government for slacking in taking care of the border issues. Wait, hold up.. this guy calling for states’ rights is now bitching that the feds haven’t taken care of business. The reality of this is that Perry is a lazy fuck when it comes to dealing with the GOP solution on immigration. Homeboy needs to check his record and then he needs to check his ass. He throws in there that a fence won’t work; he’s right about that.

Rick Santorum doesn’t like Perry’s insight about the fence though and he jumps down his throat. Santorum goes on a tirade about speaking English and how he came from immigrants. Yeah dude, we all did except those of us living on reservations.

Bachmann steps into the immigration debate and, as is the trend, she jacks Ron Paul’s platform. Bachmann believes that the real problem is the welfare state and that it needs to be severely reformed to prevent illegal aliens from benefitting from it. Actually honey, it needs to be abolished.

Rick Perry says that he is against amnesty for illegal aliens but is quickly attacked by Jon Huntsman who calls Perry “treasonous” for saying that the border cannot be physically secured by a fence. Perry is right here and Huntsman is just picking a fight to be relevant in this debate. I sort of like Jon Huntsman, simply for the fact that he is a total dick. Huntsman gets some extra points for dissing Homeland Security.

Herman Cain then tells us that he wants to create a “regulatory reduction commission” to overlook government agencies such as the EPA. I like this idea as long as it doesn’t cost a lot of money. Then again, if used correctly, it could save us tons of money and justify the cost of its existence. Then again, when does government do anything right?

Ron Paul is confronted with his vocal opposition to military spending and explains to Wolf Blitzer and the people watching that there is a difference between military spending and defense spending. Yes, there certainly is. Unfortunately the average American citizen and politician can’t wrap their head around that simple bit of logic. This of course angers pretty much everyone in the room and Ron Paul has to explain that jihadists are pissed about our involvement in their lives and the fact that we occupy their countries. He goes on to explain Osama bin Laden’s reasoning for attacking us on 9/11 by using Osama’s own words. The crowd boos because the crowd can’t accept the fact that we have an imperialistic military that steps on nuts all over the world. No! no! no! They just hate us because we’re white and different! We never did anything to piss them off!

Ron Paul’s insightful lesson is followed up by Huntsman saying that we need to get out of Afghanistan. Rick Perry then steps up to the mic and says that it is important to have a military presence in Afghanistan to help them form a civil freedom-loving society. I guess he believes the myth that warring tribes can be civil.

Wolf Blitzer then asks the final question of the night to all the candidates. He asks what each and every one of them would bring to the White House. Santorum says he’d build a room for his kids.. yawn. Ron Paul says he’s bringing Austrian economics and common sense. Newt says something about ballet. Perry says he’s bringing the best First Lady ever. Huntsman says something lame. Bachmann says something crazy. Romney fixes his hair. Cain says he’s bringing a sense of humor. I’m bringing cotton candy.

This debate ends and we’re all left with just a little bit more of the same. I think the most important thing of the night was Rick Perry getting called out on his bullshit and being exposed as an evil Sith bastard. Bachmann earned some respect for going off on the Texas Governor. I also have to give props to Paul for trying to educate the lesser beings to no avail. Don’t worry Dr. Paul, after their campaign staff explains your talking points to them, they’ll steal some of your platform for the next debate.

In the end, this was one of the better debates. I wish certain parts of the debate were better managed and that Wolf Blitzer used better judgment on who to ask specific questions. Ah well, at least we didn’t have that pervert John King making unsexy throat noises. At the end of the day, this is just one of several debates and the road to 2012 is far from over. In fact, we still have a year before we even find out who wins the primary. There’s also another dozen or so debates on the horizon. It’s going to be a long year but at least it has been entertaining. At this point, anything can happen.

Grading Scale:
Grade A: Ron Paul
Grade B+: Herman Cain
Grade B: Michele Bachmann
Grade C-: Newt Gingrich
Grade D: Mitt Romney
Grade D: Rick Santorum
Grade D-: Rick Perry
Grade D-: Jon Huntsman
Grade I: Gary Johnson
Grade I: Thaddeus McCotter

*Taken from Politico. Video at link.

Michele Bachmann accused Rick Perry of using sixth-grade girls as profit engines for a drug company at the CNN/Tea Party Express debate, lacing into the Texas governor for having attempted to mandate the HPV vaccine for young teenagers.

“To have innocent little 12-year-old girls be forced to have a government injection through an executive order is just wrong,” Bachmann said. “Little girls who have a negative reaction to this potentially dangerous drug don’t get a mulligan.”

The Minnesota congresswoman went even further, accusing Perry of handing out favors to a company, Merck, represented by his former top aide, Mike Toomey.

CONTINUED..

*Written by Rob Rimes.

Here we go again, another critique if you will on another primary debate for the GOP candidates who want to go head-to-head with Obama in 2012. This debate was the first to include, now front-runner, Texas Governor Rick Perry. He is a vile douchebag that I wrote about in ”American Psycho: The Ballad of Rick Perry“. This was also the first debate to not include Tim Pawlenty, as he dropped out of the race like a defeated little bitch even though he was voted third place after the last debate. As with all the other debates besides the first, Gary Johnson was nowhere to be found, which is fucking sacrilege. Thaddeus McCotter, another GOP candidate was also left out. He’s a guy I’d like to hear more from, even though his record is somewhat questionable. Then again, it’s nowhere near as bad as the records of the mainstream media’s handpicked golden boys.

The lineup this round consisted of my favorite candidate Ron Paul, the only one that matters; there were others as well however. The media’s new chosen golden boy Rick Perry was ready to duke it out with their original golden boy Mitt Romney. Awesome business man and non-politician Herman Cain was on stage, as was the lord of fire Newt Gingrich and supermom Michele Bachmann. Oh yeah, some how Rick Santorum and Jon Huntsman were invited too.

This debate was the first one to air on MSNBC as it was hosted by NBC and Politico. While those two organizations try to pass of as impartial and non-partisan, they are very liberal organizations. This is not a bad thing at all however. The contrast between the philosophies of the panel of moderators and the candidates should make for some entertaining television and give us a fresh perspective in this long drawn-out election cycle or so one would think.

Now I haven’t seen the tally of who had the most time but as a viewer, it felt that Perry and Romney got about half of the total debate time allotted to them and their banter against each other. I asked several other people and they also felt that this was the Perry-Romney Supershow Variety Hour. Because of this, most of the debate was lame. However, let me sum the shit up for you.

The night of course started with Emperor Rick Perry bragging about his record and how awesome he is as Texas’ dictator. Most of what he said about himself was bullshit but nobody cares because nobody checks facts anymore (here is a link for you though). Note to self: if I ever run for president I have to tell everyone I used to be a T-Rex; they’ll never know and I’ll be a fucking shoe in! Anyway, Perry lies and Romney stares at him like he wants a lick of the Perry Tootsie Pop. There’s too much good hair on the screen at one time. Mitt’s hair looks better on this night though.

So immediately the debate swings over to Mitt Romney, as the golden boys have to get the jump on the competition. He says a bunch of unimportant unmemorable shit which causes Perry to snap back and diss Mittens. It’s a golden boy shit show right off the bat! Perry disses on Mitt for his bad public sector record compared to his “great” private sector record. Mitt throws a low blow.. ba-jing! Perry and Romney go into a zing war! Shit! It’s like watching the douches smack each other with their wangs! With the country falling apart, these guys are giving us a bad reality show style squabble instead of giving us mind-blowing solutions to our peril. Whatever, the public loves them and they’re so handsome!

After the fight between the two middle school girls, our attention is directed towards Rick Santorum. How is this shitcock maroon still in this goddamned race? I think he’s only on the stage because he got lost on his way to the racquetball courts. Santorum is synonymous for slapping around blue balls. I didn’t really hear what he had to say, I’m assuming it had something to do with Jesus, war and water sports.

Herman Cain then gets the spotlight and introduces us to his 999 Plan (read about it here). I like the overall idea of the plan and it is light-years ahead of what most of these douches on the stage are peddling. I’ll critique it in-depth at a later date. Cain, who is always ready to give us a solution, attacks taxes and outshines Santorum, Perry and Romney right out the gate.

The panelists then cut over to Jon Huntsman for the first time and he goes on to tell us that we need to fix the weak broken core. I’m not sure if he is referring to America or his campaign. He also states that Utah was the number one job creator, not Texas or Massachusetts. Huntsman makes it known that Perry and Romney are both high on their own fumes and not as effective as they and the media think they are. Then again, Huntsman is about as effective as a tampon in a gunshot wound. Well, at least Huntsman gave a big shout out to free markets, not that I believe he will fight for true capitalism, he’ll most likely take a massive dump on it. However, being the ambassador to China may have taught him how capitalism works because that country has got their shit together like Legos and Gorilla Glue.

Michele gets the mic and instead of spitting a dope freestyle, she just rambles off her Tea Party talking points about Obamacare eating children and killing jobs or something like that. I’m not sure why this Canadian lady is up there. She then proceeds to remind us, for the umpteenth time in only her third debate, that she has had more children in her home than all the primary schools in Saskatchewan. She came off as bat-shit crazy in her first debate, came off really well in her second debate where she battled it out with Tim Pawlenty, but in this debate she is already back to living up to that creepy image of her from that infamous Newsweek cover. I don’t want to be a dickhole and call her a dingbat but she makes it really fucking hard.

Ron Paul finally gets the attention of Brian Williams and his cronies on the panel. Unlike Huntsman, Dr. Paul drops some knowledge on free markets and truly means what he says. He defends his stance on deregulation and doesn’t falter when Brian Williams presses him on his stance regarding the privatization of everything. Ron Paul with elegance and prose educates the panelists and other presidential candidates but of course his expertise and insight fall on deaf ears.

The moderators then point out that Newt Gingrich wrote the introduction to Rick Perry’s book. Of course the MSNBC stooges are trying to start fires and stir the pot for some Republican Party infighting. Newt takes a shot at Perry but doesn’t jab too hard as he uses his time to point out Obama’s blatant use of class warfare.

They return to Golden Boy 2 and ask Romney a question. Luckily for us viewers, there are technical difficulties. The gist of this exchange is an attempt by the moderators on the panel to drag the Romneycare skeletons out of the closet. To dodge this bullet and divert the attention off of himself, Romney promises to offer waivers for any state that wants to opt out of Obamacare. Um.. dude.. why don’t you just murder that bill instead? Repeal the fuck out of it, that’s what you said you would do before. Is he flip-flopping or stumbling through his thoughts?

The health care debate rolls over towards Golden Boy 1 Rick Perry but he dodges bullets like the Ghost Twins from the second ‘Matrix’ movie. Question: Why are so many people in Texas without health care. A: I had to buy some suits and hair gel. Huntsman jumps in the mix, says some unimportant shit and is obviously wearing John Boehner’s skin as he is orange as fuck under those hot stage lights. Bachmann jumps in to pat herself on the back and surprisingly doesn’t mention one of her 1,274 kids.

The debate continues and continues and not a lot of important shit happens or is said. Overall, this is the least memorable of all the debates thus far, even with it being Perry’s debut. So what’s that say about Perry? Also, being in the den of liberals isn’t as exciting as it should be. Ah well, we’re only halfway here.

The most memorable part of the night besides Ron Paul being the only real people’s candidate up there was Newt Gingrich going off on the moderators for their attempts to divide the candidates and create drama. Everything else is really just filler and redundant rhetoric used to trigger cheap pops from the crowd.

Rick Perry did attack Ron Paul at a point and talked of how Paul was pro-Reagan and then anti-Republican back in the 1980′s. Ron Paul defending himself well and pointed out that he supported Reagan in ’76 and ’80 but by ’88 had grown tired of the “politics as usual” of the spend-crazy Reagan Administration and so he left the party to run for president under the banner of the Libertarian Party. This issue is about the only “dirt” anyone can dig up on Ron Paul and it isn’t even dirt. It certainly isn’t as fucking bad as Rick Perry working on Al Gore’s political campaign in ’88!

After Perry’s pot-stirring bullshit with Ron Paul, he was confronted with the fact that George W. Bush’s minions Karl Rove and Dick Cheney have been bashing him to the media. Perry just looks uncomfortable and can’t really formulate a real defense. Between the long pauses and lack of real answers on most issues, Perry looks incredibly weak in this debate. I severely dislike the guy but if he’s such a great candidate why can’t he present himself better? I was disappointed in his performance but at the same time grateful because he did horrible. Then again, after the debate, the media is still pimping him out!

One of the big subjects of the debate was Social Security. The best solution to the problem was brought up by Herman Cain who said that we should adopt the Chilean model. Essentially, that would involve privatizing it. Read more on the Chilean model here.

Rick Perry is finally confronted with the fact that he tried to force vaccinations on girls going into the sixth grade. Ron Paul throws some shit in Perry’s lap, which was refreshing. Attacking other candidates is not Ron Paul’s style but when Rick Perry is a dirty evil son of a bitch, Dr. Paul did the right thing. Bachmann also jumped on Perry and said that what he did was a violation of parental rights. Then she spun that into education reform and I got confused.

Back on topic, Rick Perry tried to defend his Hitler-esque program. His explanation was lame, pointless and did nothing to assure people that he wasn’t a douchebag.. well, except for the mainstream media who still sip his semen cider. One thing Perry forgot to mention however is that the drug company Merck was a huge contributor to his campaigns.

The next big topic to come up is Homeland Security and the TSA. Newt Gingrich informs us that people want to kill us and that we have to have DHS and the TSA. Ron Paul makes a case for privatizing the TSA, he also used his time to rightfully bash FEMA. Jon Huntsman wants a more efficient Department of Homeland Security.

Rick Perry is then challenged on his ability to manage education in this country, as his state has the worst graduation rates in the country. As with everything he is challenged with, Perry doesn’t have a good solid answer. I’m beginning to wonder if his long dramatic pauses are an attempt to collect his thoughts, an attempt to fashion a lie or a way to waste time in order to not really answer the questions. I bet it’s a combination of the three. Everyone else up there is pretty much in favor of school choice.

MSNBC then dusts off their latino reporter for the segment on immigration. Rick Perry, a guy whose record proves he couldn’t care less about border security, calls for more border agents. He also calls for Predator drones. Dude, their are already fucking Predator drones on YOUR state’s border! Are you that fucking dense? Or do you really not pay that much attention? Why did no one call him out on this blatant fucking oversight?!

Mitt Romney wants a super fence on the border and promises no amnesty whatsoever. Newt educates the audience and the moderators on why Reagan went with amnesty and immigration reform. Rick Santorum wants to lock the border down and after that he’d be willing to have discussions about immigration. So, no discussions until we close off those we would have the discussions with. Michele Bachmann believes this magic fence would save us from drug cartels. Is it tall enough to stop helicopters and catapults? All these people need to watch the immigration episode of ‘Penn & Teller’s Bullshit’. At least Herman Cain believes that immigration issues should be handled at the state level and that the federal government should have no control over state’s decisions to combat the problem.

Ron Paul is the only candidate to drop any real knowledge when he goes on to explain how the fence is stupid and that it could potentially be used to keep us in as opposed to keeping people out. He also breaks down the real problems which are the drug war and the welfare system. I wrote about these issues and how they relate to immigration in “Conservatives & Aliens“.

Hey, where’s the latino guy?! Oh, the immigration segment is over. Well played MSNBC.

Romney goes on to explain how he will prevent us from going into a recession. Apparently he is unaware that we are already in a recession. That’s understandable I guess, we’ve only been in it for 3 years. He then attacks Obama for his lack of leadership in an effort to run out time and avoid answering the Tea Party themed question. Mittens is no constitutional conservative.

When Rick Perry is asked if he thinks that Bush II was too quick to launch military intervention. He then dodges the Bush question to give Obama props on his military prowess! He also gives props to the Navy SEALs. Perry actually says “propes” instead of “props” because he is a backwoods fuck that is trying to be cool and fit in with the kids. Stop trying douche-sandwich! You’re whack as fuck and no one likes your DJ!

Tea Party darling Michele Bachmann claims that the U.S. military has been responsible for maintaining global order. WTF?! Is this dingbat rubbing angeldust on her gums again? She does not represent the Tea Party if she believes this and if the majority of the Tea Party also believes this, then the Tea Party is a bunch of frauds. Bachmann wants to reign in a global police state apparently. “Yay!” for military interventionism! She is against Libya but still cool with being the global police. It’s all interventionism and none of it is any of our business. Well, except what was made our business because of previous interventionism and military meddling.

Oh yeah, more Rick Santorum! Why is he still in this damn race? Once again, where the hell is Gary Johnson?! And why isn’t McCotter here as well?

These conservatives are now on the subject of science, something most of them don’t understand. They just look at it as another “religion” in competition with Christianity. Huntsman says we can’t run from science, we need to embrace it. Um.. no duh! He says we must do what must be done to win voters. Okay, so is he asking to abandon religion? Perry believes that the science on climate change isn’t “settled”. Bachmann points out that an agenda is being put out in front of real science, which is true but it is also not a reason to completely disregard it. It is still based more in facts and reality than any faith-based belief system.

Newt Gingrich then wins a few points from me when he says that if he were president he would immediately fire Ben Bernanke and audit the Federal Reserve. Man, Ron Paul is starting to rub off on some people. As I’ve stated many times over, I have never liked Newt Gingrich and still don’t support most of his policies but he is winning me over (especially over Perry, Romney, Bachmann, Hunstsman and Santorum). Paul and Cain are the only two I put ahead of him right now.. well, and Gary Johnson too but where the fuck is he again? Romney then jumps on the bandwagon and says he’d fire Bernanke too. Whatever dude, stop pandering.

The panel then basically gives the rest of the time to the two golden boys. Perry goes on a tangent about the evils of killing children and how the greatest crime against humanity is “heinous crimes against our citizens”. Yeah dude, what exactly were your attempts at forced inoculation? Are you absolved of the crime because you only had intent and didn’t do the crime? So the Texas legislators that prevented you from implementing your Nazi health program also washed your hands of any wrongdoing? What if they didn’t stop you, would you still be a stand up guy?

Ron Paul gets one more brief moment to speak and he uses his last minute or so to explain that there is nowhere in the Constitution that gives the federal government the power to force us all into a welfare state. He vows to fight it and end the tyranny of the welfare system. Let’s do this! The debate then officially ends at 9:49 PM EST, eleven minutes early.

Overall, this debate pretty much sucked. It was better than that horrible CNN one where John King assaulted us with his throat noises but it was a lot weaker than what I had hoped for. Perry just isn’t a good speaker and I can’t put a finger on why everyone loves him. Well, Hitler got into power somehow so I guess it isn’t too farfetched to believe that this needle stabbing Nazi doesn’t have a real chance. Romney did nothing but he out-shined Perry, Santorum and Huntsman were piss breaks and Bachmann was frantically whittling little race cars for her 2,549 kids between questions. Ron Paul is the only one that had me fist-pumping although Herman Cain and Newt Gingrich also had some very high points.

Without further ado, here’s my letter grade ranking system.

Grading Scale:
Grade A-: Ron Paul
Grade B+: Herman Cain
Grade B: Newt Gingrich
Grade C: Mitt Romney
Grade D: Michele Bachmann
Grade D-: John Hunstsman
Grade D-: Rick Perry
Grade F: Rick Santorum
Grade I: Gary Johnson
Grade I: Thaddeus McCotter

My Two Cents: Wake the fuck up people! Video made by TokenLibertarianGirl who has plenty of other great videos. End Two Cents.

Libertarian Party (LP) Executive Director Wes Benedict spoke today about the presidential aspirations of Texas Governor Rick Perry.

“Rick Perry, you are a pretender, not a defender of free markets.”
More here.

Flashback: Perry attends Bilderberg.